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Tycho

We hadn’t done a strip on the G4 Network yet, and with the announcement of their actual line-up it seemed like a good time.  Gabe has optimism but realistic fears, which he will no doubt elucidate in a few hours’ time.  The only thing I know for certain is that they need a Penny Arcade show.  I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. 

Instead of doing a strip about it - which I don’t think is really the proper approach - let’s just talk about Tribes: Fast Attack in more detail.  Even after I wished upon him grave physical harm, Alex “Marweas” Rodberg wrote me up with the digits saying we should talk about shit.  This is actually the proper response:  I don’t say things like that because I actually think his spine would be better as two separate lengths, I’m calling him out.  I carried on an extended conversation with Kelly Flock, long after the strip in question, and found that people secure in what they’re doing don’t really have a problem with the things we do at Penny Arcade.  Alex was the same way - congenial but direct, he is of the opinion that T:FA is the proper direction for the franchise to take, and it is (in fact) his job to make those decisions.  And, I respect him even if I’m not crazy about his Tribes philosophy.  Myself, I am of the opinion that a year of concerted bitchery - the whiner’s choir of the TribalWar forums - has finally secured for themselves the Tribes 2 they wanted to begin with.  Well, they can have it.  I was never one for community reindeer games, which is why I have my own site and they have a handle on some fucking message board.

The seeds of Tribes: Fast Attack and Tribes 2 are both present in the original, it’s just that each selects (in the evolutionary sense of the word) different characteristics to be dominant.  There will always be those who claim to hate Tribes 2, but from a game perspective, it is in every way a sequel.  Better graphics.  More vehicles.  More emphasis on teamwork.  Richer armor configurations.  Larger maps.  More robust defensive options.  The much-maligned slowness of T2 is there by virtue of expanded tactical depth.  I asked Alex if, going forward, he thought of Tribes: Fast Attack as their selecting an evolutionary branch to carry into Tribes 3.  He said that he’d like to see future products have something that everyone can enjoy.  That struck me as a bold move.

It’ll never happen, but I’d like to have seen Tribes 3 even bigger than Tribes 2.  Larger, enclosed vehicles to transport troops, with automated or manual arms to fire on fortified enemy positions.  Detailed, believable structures.  License a third-party engine right out the gate, to spend the entire development cycle working on content and gameplay.  Larger individual servers, or metagames that take place across several.  Cinch up the Starsiege universe with a return to Earth, or the Cybrids - introduce the ancient war machines, to scale against the armored Tribes.  I’m sure T:FA will be fine.  I’ll just have to take your word on it.   

Regarding the Triple Threat - that invincible trio of fabulous contests - I’ll announce the victors this Friday coming up.  Many of you asked why I chose to use a Hotmail account as the contact for it, especially after the Hotmail account broke into little pieces and would no longer contain mail.  Well, the simple fact is that more often than not, your species doesn’t take full advantage of my exciting offers.  I suppose that the last contest - which basically involved breaking your arm as you lay on an entire cake - might not be the best concept to drive participation, but I was truly shocked when the mongrel hordes surged over the ramparts of my flimsy, free e-mail account for all three of the prizes.  I accepted mails that came to my account, and did not take affront to their being there - what the hell else were you supposed to do?  Anyhow, I think I’ve already got another 3T lined up, might even be later this month.   

Six quick links to arrest your productivity:

  • Eric Harshbarger’s Lego Site:  His medium is legos, his world is the world of bricks.  Gobs of legomaniacal links, along with ample sample portraits of his sculptures will fascinate young and old.  It’s understood that (for any of the gift holidays) even at the ripe old age of however old I am the gift of lego is one that will be well received.

  • $95,000 Adventure:  I actually don’t care if this is true or not.  I think of it as light-hearted, feel-good fiction like you might find in My Boot.  It’s got some kinda Hallmarky crap in it, but on the whole it’s a good read.

  • Cedric Henry’s Aesop:  The strip I link to here is in response to our nefarious fur-related antics, but it is my opinion that you’d be well-served by his stuff in general.

  • A Mechanical Horror:  A friendly reader suggested this steel monster might make for an acceptable Robo-Croc, and I am likely to agree.

  • NothingArena:  Reader Farbs sent in this marvel, a mutator for Unreal Tournament that excises the pesky weaponry.  He claims that when the mod is in effect, the bots just glare at each other and then go their separate ways.

  • I Almost Forgot:  I snapped a shot of Brenna’s new tattoo, done by family friend Owen Connell from the Pound Gallery.  I really like his stuff.

Yeah, so Friday, we’ll do the prize thing and investigate more of the Game Detective storyline.  We do hope you will attend! 

(CW)TB out.

‘cause i’m honeydew bunsen

Tycho

With E3 coming up again, I’m reminded of how impressed we were with Sony/Verant/Omni Consumer Products’ highly anticipated Planetside.  Easily my favorite game of last year’s show, it was looking mighty fine and intrigued with hinted at, gesticulated toward multiplayer concepts.

Until we know more, it’s impossible to say whether it can (as a game) compel me to pay a monthly - but on the face of it, it appears to do many of the things I wanted out of Tribes 3.

(CW)TB

Gabe

I have used this space on countless occasions to express my opinions about Star Wars games. I have sent e-mails to Lucas Arts time and time again detailing my ideas for new games. For my efforts I have received letters from Lucas Arts legal department asking that I not send anymore unsolicited creative ideas. I have talked to many of the actual people who develop the Star Wars games that you and I play. While it’s true that they are extremely friendly people they politely switch subjects when the conversation turns to my own game ideas. This has led me to the conclusion that I need to be employed at Lucas Arts in order to see my dreams become a reality. And so with that in mind I give you…my resume:

Gabriel 

Objective:
Employment with Lucas Arts Entertainment for the purpose of creating a video game based on the New Jedi Order novels.

Employment Experience:
-Online cartoonist and internet asshole. Nov. 1998-Current

Education:
-I went to high school and got pretty good grades.

Skills I Don’t Have:
-Any professional experience working as a 3D modeler in computer gaming.
-Strong technical aptitude related to 3D modeling tools and game engine technologies.
-Complete command of Maya’s modeling and texturing tools.
-Ability to work with a high degree of self-direction
-Excellent organizational, communication and interpersonal skills.
-Receptiveness to art direction and the ability to perform well within a collaborative team environment.
-Responsiveness to deadlines and ability to work well under pressure.
-Willingness to work overtime when necessary.

Unique Qualifications:
-I was born in 1977, the same year Star Wars was released into theatres.
-As a child I owned the Darth Vader head carrying case for my Star Wars action figures.
-I have seen both Ewok movies.
-My favorite Star Wars movie is Empire, this proves I am a true fan. As does the fact that I refer to it as “Empire” as opposed to its full name, the Empire Strikes Back.
-I know who Jagged Fel and Kyp Durron are and why they kick so much ass.
-I cried like a baby when *** Spoiler Removed *** Died in the book Star by Star.
-I know about the part in Return of the Jedi where you can see the Twi’lek dancers boob for just a second.

If that doesn’t get me a job at Lucas Arts I honestly don’t know what could.

-Gabe out

Gabe

I am captain apology of the sorry brigade. I feel absolutely terrible about that spoiler I dropped in my update. I had no intention of ruining the series for those of you just getting into it.

People have mailed me asking why I haven’t chimed in on the Tribes: Fast Attack deal. I had no intention of saying anything. Tycho and I are pretty much on the same page on this one.  Many of you seem to want my opinion though so I’ve decided to give it to you. Once again I slip into the role of the “angry gamer” that has dominated many of my recent posts. I guess every family has to have one.

I think Tribes 2:FA is a step backwards for the franchise and I feel like it strips away all the things that made tribes a unique multiplayer experience. For the record I loved Tribes 1 and 2. When it worked right there was nothing that could compare to Tribes 2. For me Tribes was about warfare on a massive scale. It was about huge teams battling it out over massive maps. More than anything, Tribes was about teamwork. It’s unfortunate too, because many of the drooling morons that populated the games servers played it like it was Quake with vehicles. Heading off on their own in half empty vehicles and ignoring requests to shore up defenses or coordinate attacks. They bitched and moaned in forums that they wanted it to be faster, with smaller maps. They wanted focus taken off team cooperation and instead turned to individual, skilled players. They wanted something Tribes was never meant to be. I’ll say it again, Tribes was something special. It deserves better than this. I can remember eating Chinese food with the original development team in Oregon after Tribes 1 came out. These guys loved Tribes, you could fucking tell. They had amazing ideas for Tribes 2, stuff like submarines that never saw the light of day. These are the people that should be deciding the future of the Tribes franchise. These were the people that had their heads screwed on right. They delivered a product under circumstances that would have driven anyone else insane. I can’t go into half of the shit I was privy too about the development of Tribes 2. But these guys stayed because they cared about the game. Then, once the product shipped their reward was a pink slip. For all their hard work they got kicked out on the street. Tribes is no longer in the Hands of the people who care about the franchise. The people at the wheel now only care about making another FPS game that will please the vocal minority and bring nothing new to the genre. All the potential that Tribes had has been tossed out the window and forgotten about. The whining masses of junior high students that populate Tribes message boards have succeeded in killing off one of the most original games to ever come down the pipe. I hope they like what they get, they fucking deserve it. Me, I’ll probably never play another tribes game again. At least not with the same affection I had for the first two. I consider myself lucky to have had the opportunity to play them both. They were truly ahead of their time.

I have gotten a few mails asking why I seem so upset all the time. People have asked if I have some kind of mood disorder. I seem to oscillate between absolute joy and total rage. Rarely do I appear to occupy any sort of emotional middle ground.  The only thing I can say is that I love video games. Anyone who spends any time with me will tell you I think about them entirely too much. When you feel as strongly about something as I do about games it’s hard to have a un-emotional opinion either way. If I love something I really fucking love it. I could have eaten REZ with a spoon it was so delicious. ICO made me feel better about my life and the human race in general. When I don’t like something though, I get just as passionate. When I see a game like Herdy Gerdy flush so much potential right down the toilet I get mad. When I see a company make what I think are poor decisions about a franchise I get pissed off.  Is this healthy? Probably not. But there isn’t a goddmaned thing I can do about. I love video games. 

-Gabe out