Penny Arcade

How is everyone?  Good, I hope.  Would anyone else like to level a spurious allegation against us?  I do so relish it.  However, please ensure that your equipment can manage our Mongol horde!

I know that you come to Penny Arcade to have your rabble roused, and today is no exception.  Through the virtuous MadMan and his humble cafe, we were alerted to an article on ExtremeTech detailing GameSpot’s new Download Manager Assisted Download of Download Download technology which is - in effect - a digital penis cocked and ready to penetrate your rights.  Shit, I don’t know.  I’m basically just making this up as I go along.  Readers do discuss the article I mentioned here, but they’re more meditations on spyware in general than specific claims of injury from the software.  Is Gamespot’s implementation evil?  I installed it, and now my mom is dead.  You be the judge.         

I’m wondering if you’ve seen the reports coming in on ATI’s new video part.  I’ve gone with nVidia ever since I got the (perhaps mistaken) impression that the games I play are developed and tested on them, and also because I find installing their leaked drivers to hold such an illicit thrill.  Jesus, I’ll ask again:  Have you seen these reports?  When I heard ATI’s “new board” was going to be all that and a bag of etcetera, like any sensible person I utterly disregarded it.  People are always saying shit like that.  They’re always claiming to have tricked a genie into revealing ultimate 3D secrets.  Well, ATI has a genie, or something, because they’re posting some pretty serious numbers.  I’ve got to tell you, though - I guess I’m glad that nVidia has a real competitor again, nice to have a choice in that space as it is called, but I don’t feel like the problem with graphics cards is that they aren’t fast enough.  The problem is that they cost too fucking much, period, and somebody needs to fix this.  If ATI’s cards perform better and end up costing less than their GeForce counterparts, well, that’s something I could get excited about.  I’d like to see some knock-down, drag-out shit that injects a bit of sanity into the high end.  If ATI is serious with this generation, they’ll make themselves the obvious choice. 

Mac users, they’re making a version of Everquest for you now.  Whether or not that’s actually a good thing is a debate that will outlive the sun.

(CW)TB out.

i don’t know why they keep asking for it

Are we going to import Super Mario Sunshine, even though it’ll be out in the US in just thirty days?  Hell yes.

(CW)TB

People have been asking when we are going to start updating Land of the Rising Fun again. Honestly there just hasn’t been a lot of Import news to cover. That has all changed now though. Gungrave, Mario Sunshine and Beach Spikers all just hit Japan and the holly Ikaruga is set to drop in the near future. The import scene is really starting to cook and we are trying our damndest to get in on some of the action. As soon as we start getting some of these titles in you can bet your ass we’ll be covering them here. I also got quite a bit of mail after my Neo-Geo reviews from people wanting to know where they can get their own home cart system. Well the guys at the Videogame depot just got a batch of them.  If you want the best 2D fighting game ever made to go along with your new Neo-Geo, and you make poor money management decisions then I’d recommend picking up a copy of Mark of the Wolves while you’re there.

On the subject of Ikaruga, if you need a shooter fix and just can’t wait for its release on the Dreamcast you should try Soukyugerentai for the Saturn. It is easily on of the best shooters I’ve ever played. Even Tycho, who is something of a connoisseur of the genre had nothing but nice things to say about it. You’re going to need a Saturn to play it obviously, but it’s my opinion that if you don’t have a Saturn you’re missing out on a lot more than just Soukyugerentai. The game looks sharp and delivers some very cool looking 3D effects considering its age. As far as shooters go its got everything you would expect, from floating power ups that increase the number of shots you fire to bombs that deliver screen filling explosions. One of the coolest features though is the special weapons. By holding down the fire button you can engage your ships special attack. A wire frame grid will start to expand from your vehicle in some geometric shape depending on your choice of ship. When you release the button any enemies that happen to be within the perimeter of that wire frame get screwed courtesy of massive cannons that automatically lock onto them and fire. This grid actually expands in three dimensions so you will find yourself trapping enemies above and below you with it as well. Add to the mix the fact that each of the three ships you can choose from behave quite differently and you have a recipe for re-playability, something that most shooters are sorely lacking.

In other news the Penny Arcade crew will be making the long trek down to sunny California in order to take part in the San Diego Comic-Con. We will be hanging out at the Gameskins booth chatting and signing whatever people stick in front of us. Not only that, It will also be your first opportunity to purchase the brand new Penny Arcade poster. You can see a little shot of the poster below.

To get your hands on the oh so glossy real deal, you are gonna have to get yourself to the Comic-Con. Tycho, Safety Monkey, Batjew, Kara and myself will all be down there. We’d love it if you stop by the Gameskins booth and say hi…or just buy a poster. Or say hi and then buy a poster. It’s really up to you, we aren’t picky.

-Gabe out

Here is the latest update from Fatrick regarding the Necrowombicon:


It has been brought to my attention that some people assume that registering for the convention at thenecrowombicon@hotmail.com will get you the group rate at the hotel.
this is incorrect.
you must deal with the hotel yourself to get the group rate.
in order to get the $129 a night group rate, you needed to call the hotel and reserve a room by Tuesday the 16th of July. After that, you’re on your own for accommodations.

Also, In order for me to know that the people lining up at Playdium are from PA and have registered, you must have a valid Gamer Corps Card. (found here:  http://members.shaw.ca/patthornley/necro/Game%20Corps%20Card.gif) please print out your own copy, and fill it out, and show it to me when you line up. that way I can verify who’s with us, and who’s not, and haze the people who aren’t appropriately.

That is all for now, remember to check out the Necro page at:
www.pacult.com/nwc2.php

Also at the Gameskins booth will be your BIG CHANCE to score a new BATJEW tshirt!  Just like the one in the poster only it’s black and not covered with spit!  I can spit on it for you, but only after you buy it first.

Oh, and seeing as Kara and I both had our birthdays this week, we decided our present to ourselves would be to NOT do Love & Hate.  It will probably return next week.  Most likely there will be some changes to that feature.  We are sick to death of shy teenagers being in love with girls that already have boyfriends.  We’re sure most of you are too.  Unless you’re some sort of shy teenager in love with a girl that has a boyfriend.  In which case you probably want to know what you should do.  Well, I’ll tell ya.  GIVE UP AND TAKE EVERY PILL IN YOUR HOUSE(but buy a batjew tshirt first.  Seriously, I dream of teenagers being found dead of overdoses while wearing my tshirts.)

Love, luck and lollipops!
Batjew!

PS: you should also buy delicious toothpaste.

This has been coming up a lot in my e-mail so I figured I should just answer it right here. It seems that many of you who cannot make it to the con are sending your friends down with money to purchase posters for you. Obviously you need to know how much cash to give these friends. The posters will be $15.00 and no, we will not be charging anything extra to sign them for you. Some people have been asking what times we will be available to sign stuff. The answer is: as long as it takes to sign everything and meet all of you. We have no desire to see the rest of the con at all. We are going for the sole purpose of hooking you guys up with our poster and signing the shit out of whatever you bring us. If things are slow and we decide to scamper off one of the folks at the table will just ring our cell and we will get our asses back there lickity split.

-Gabe out

It is time to answerer more poster questions since that is all I get in my e-mail anymore.

Q. I can’t make it down to the Comic-Con and I don’t know anyone who is going. Will you be selling the posters via the website at some point?

A. If we have any posters left over after the con we plan to sell them on the website. However, I can’t say for certain that we will have any extras. If the response in my e-mail is any indication, I have a feeling we might not.

Q. If you do sell them via the website will they be signed like the ones at the con?

A. Probably not. We will only be signing the ones we sell at the con.

Q. How big is the poster?

A. It is 24 inches wide by 17 inches high.

-Gabe out