I keep having trouble uploading strips, my apologies, but here you are.

One would hope that after a few years exposed to Gabriel's "unique" perspective, any ideas you might have had about him not being a reprobate have dissolved entirely. If his callous acts and intense, serial frivolity were not enough to set you right, behold! Incontrovertible proof of his true nature, from the GamerTag Database. The young man in the comments section there has described, indeed, compressed Gabriel into twelve words. He was, of course, overjoyed.

Because I like rumors, and I think that rumors are fun, lets talk about a rumor for a second.

I believe I'm on record as saying that the only console capable of Splinter Cell was the Xbox and maybe the GameCube. Clearly, I fucked that one up. For better or worse, the game is even coming out for the GameBoy Advance, though I'm not sure that counts for these purposes. I still think I'm sorta right, but you can be the judge of that - there's still very little chance of downloadable episodes on any other platform, right? I'm sure they'll make me regret that, too.

This Eurogamer article is all sunshine and roses for the PS2 port, which is fine by me. I won't know until I play it how good it is. But I think that it had to be good, great in fact, and it had to have exclusive content, because Splinter Cell was one of very few cases where you could say, "Here is something you simply can't have on the PS2." Visually, it challenged the Playstation 2 to do better. I am of the opinion that the PS2 release of the game is one part product and one part press release about the system's continuing technological viability.

The rumor I heard goes like this: Ubi Soft had no problems doing the GameCube version, but they had misgivings about trying to make the jump to the PS2 hardware. So it is told, they refused to convert the game at all unless Sony itself paid for the graphics engine to be rebuilt from the ground up. Like I said, I loves me some rumors so who knows if it is legitimate. It does, however, fit my natural biases!

You might remember the piece I did on Zettai Zetsumei Toshi for the Rising Fun section. Looking online, I see that the U.S. release - called "Disaster Report" - should be in stores today. I had no idea it had just come out actually, the reason I brought it up was this screenshot over at Gamespot that illustrates some of the points in my article.

(CW)TB out.

i hope that someone gets my

Check out Gamespot's review of Dark Cloud 2 and tell me that don't sound mighty fine. I thought the first one had some good ideas that didn't always gel right, and it sounds as though my hopes were not misspent on the sequel.

(CW)TB

Jesus, when I ask you guys your opinions on PC’s I fucking get your opinions on PC’s. After reading well over a thousand e-mails on the subject I came away with some really good ideas about what should be in my next rig. Thank you to everyone who wrote in with your advice. I have decided to stick with a PC and I am going to have the same place that built my current machine build my new one. The guys over at Two Geeks Computers did a great job on this one so I see no reason to switch to someone new now. I have nailed down the specs and my new machine should arrive sometime next week. I’ll give you all a full report when it shows up.

I am as giddy as a school girl thinking about my new machine. There is just something about a new computer that gets me all tingly.

I am gonna go get some Chinese food today with a couple guys I met playing MechAssault. I don’t think they are crazy but if I am not back by tomorrow please call the police.

-Gabe out

Dear Diary,

I Spent the day getting beaten at Capcom vs SNK 2. I think I may be the worst player in the world. Blanka and Bison suck. Anyone who chooses EO-ism is a dill hole. Billy bumped into me today at school, he’s dreamy.

-Gabe out

Okay, so apparently we helped destroy the Gamer Tag Database. Fabulous. Before that, we (I suppose I should say you) reamed The Visual Thesaurus, the most staggering website of our time. Eventually, someone will have to invent a word for this phenomenon.

(CW)TB

MechAssault Content is available now.

-Gabe out

My two favorite names that I have heard for PA breaking a server are:

"Wanged"

and

"Tubed"

-Gabe out

Look at this, Color Hiptops in Europe. Son of a bitch. The main thing I want in a screen this small is legibility, and the Hiptop has that, but God Damn if I don't like colors.

Also, "Tubed" is good. Until someone improves upon it, let it be entered into the lexicon.

(CW)TB