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Tycho

Seeing the new McFarlane “Twisted Land of Oz” toys got us thinking about American McGee’s Oz, about which fairly little is known.  We do, however, have some insights on his next project.

As I mentioned on Friday, we did indeed go check out Brute Force - and came away with a pretty good feeling about it.  The feeling wasn’t good the whole time, as you’ll see below.

The PR Manager initially tried to cloak the game conceptually in a “Tactical Shooter” motif, but since your tactical options often amount to shooting your gun or not shooting it, we needn’t spend much time meditating on that moniker.  There is nothing wrong with a game where all you do is shoot things, provided it is fun and rewarding to do so.  And it is.  The ragdoll physics, as seen in games like UT2k3 or Raven Shield, are satisfying and well executed.  The areas we saw were visually diverse, but you may not have much time to appreciate them as mutants will be shooting you almost the whole time.

Brute Force is the name of a special forces unit that is built, soldier by soldier, into the skill-balanced entourage you might have seen in glossy promotional materials.  You have the Tank, the Assassin, the Sniper, and a Primal Reptile Man, which means they could also make a decent rock band.  Each has special abilities which correlate to their function, like the ability to dual-wield firearms, engage a cloaking device, and so forth that are powered by an ability bar below your health.  Each character also has varying levels of health and ability, so trying to act out of a given soldier’s role is inadvisable.  You can give orders and assign waypoints via an easy-to-use command system you control with the D-pad and face buttons.

We were told that other editors have come away from the game wowed by the graphics, but that was most certainly not our initial assessment.  It looked alright, but it wasn’t until we got it off the High Definition TV and onto a regular television that it really started to shine.  On the first television, the aliasing was fairly intense and robbed otherwise scenic vistas of their power.  Honestly, I think it might have just been this build, because the graphics are indeed very good, I’d even say great, on a regular television.       

I think that the Lizard Man looks stupid.  All the characters are extremely generic in appearance, take a gander at some art if you think I’m just being jaded - but the Lizard Man is inexcusable in my opinion.  Our offer to look at concept art and initial screenshots still stands, developers.  If you are thinking, “I wonder if my ridiculous Lizard Man looks too stupid,” that is a question you can get answered the same day.  Our addresses are on the site.     

Brute Force sports two sorts of multiplayer, Deathmatch and Squad Deathmatch, which may require some explanation.  In deathmatch, up to eight can play as any of the main characters or the enemies, provided you have collected their “DNA” which is sometimes hidden in level.  Since each of these enemies also has a special ability, collecting them can be an excellent way to keep things fresh in that mode.  Clever rolling bombs that seek out your foes also keep things fresh by destroying human beings.  Squad Deathmatch gives each player a team of four, and - using the sensible and ergonomic interface for controlling squadmates in single player - humans may do battle with an AI entourage. 

It might sound like I didn’t like it very much, and it’s true that I like some things better than others.  But, let’s remember - this is a shooter we’re talking about, and a fun one, so a Lizard Man being dumb or a Jagged Edge on Some Polygons in High Definition Mode isn’t something that is going to keep me awake at night.  I have every intention of purchasing the game, but let’s be clear - I am getting it for the four player co-operative campaign, and that’s about it.  I appreciate that new missions will be made available over Live, but without actual Live play I doubt I am going to see much DM.  If a Deathmatch game comes up when we have Xboxes hooked together, it’s not going to be Brute Force.  I’ll give you a hint which game is going to get played:  It’s Round, And Angels Wear it.     

Before we left, apparently press copies of Phantasy Star Online for the Xbox had just arrived, and we were treated to them.  They are likely to regret that come Wednesday.

(CW)TB out.

that’s all i drop

Tycho

I think these guys have their thumb on the pulse of the gaming community.  Also, the fishing community.

(CW)TB

Tycho

Safety Monkey has a friend named Wally, who I often refer to as Wallingford, or by his handle Xarion.  They’re friends to this day because of Meridian 59, which they played years ago, and he used to visit from Wisconsin from time to time.  He has no accent to speak of, except when he says Cat, which comes out like “Kyat.”  In any event, he doesn’t need to visit anymore because he lives here.  This story is from when he didn’t.

On a whim, he and two friends drove from Wisconsin to Seattle at a straight shot, and that seemed like something worth celebrating.  If you are a young person, I recommend that you celebrate a trek like that with wholesome milk.  We did not.  We celebrated with Liquor, which is like milk, except that it issues forth from the devil’s cold teat.  Being bartenders, Xarion and his cohorts crafted beverages whose names are not known to men.  He even invented a drink for me, which was exceedingly vile, and constructed thusly:  Two shots of vodka, Grenadine, and Alka Seltzer.  I’m not actually sure if he likes me very much.

That was the second place we went.  The first place was Sushi Chiso, where I had Sea Urchin.  They had two kinds of sea urchin there, cheap and very expensive, and I am glad I got the cheap one because I threw up in my mouth.  It tasted like a combination of sand, peanut butter, and bile, and I apparently my stomach couldn’t wait to start digesting it. 

By the time we made it to the fourth such establishment, my friend Gone had mentioned more than once something called a Cowboy Killer.  I don’t have any particular interest in Cowboys, the killing seemed interesting, however he would not discuss the specifics of it, murmuring something about red and blue pills and how I couldn’t be told what the Matrix was.  I was like, whatever.  A couple of the other guys almost got into a fight over something in the Dungeon Masters Guide, so we were none of us feeling any pain.  Yet.

Xarion’s friend wanted to know if my man Nihil and I were ready to do Cowboy Killers.  I had tried to go to the bathroom just before this, and a loop from my fleece jacket had gotten caught on the pinball machine so I couldn’t move, and I had chalked it up to “force fields.”  So this is the state of mind I was in when a shot of tequila, two lemon wedges, and a rubber band were placed before me. 

I looked at them for a moment.

I couldn’t imagine any way to combine these things that would not hurt.  Bob Wisconsin (I can’t remember his name) began to speak:           

“Place the rubber band around your head, then squeeze the lemons into your eyes.  Fumble around like a sightless kitten until you find your shot of tequila, at which point you will drink it and snap the rubber band.”

Do I need to put some kind of disclaimer on here?  What I was about to do is not glamorous.  Please don’t do this, it sucks. 

As I squeezed the lemons into my eyes, new genres of pain were revealed.  I reached out in agony for my liquor, which seemed distant.  I ran into Nihil and nearly fell, but came up with the Tequila, and did my duty by it.  I felt like an Olympian, such was my dedication to this act.  I snapped the rubber band, and it was like being hit with a hammer.  My cruel tormentor claimed I had not snapped it with enough vigor, which seems strange to me as my mind still echoes with that blow, as the music hall recalls the strains of the master’s violin.  I pulled it out to nearly twice it’s length - I wasn’t going to do this again - and it came back like a gunshot, knocking my head back and leaving a welt I would see the next day.

So do not, do not, under any circumstances become curious as to the nature of Cowboy Killers.  They are administered by psychotic people from Wisconsin who are nourished by human suffering.

(CW)TB    

Gabe

My take on McGee/McFarlane:

Making something gross or sexual or both is probably the easiest thing in the world to do. Just look at the margins of any 7th graders homework. You will find plenty of doodles on par with anything McGee has produced. American has said that his new game OZ will stay fairly true to the books but it will be “darker”. It’s sad that is the best he can come up with. American has the opportunity to take these well known and loved stories and re-imagine them for the world of video games, a medium with unlimited possibilities. When he made Alice I gave him credit for taking the story in a new direction even if it wasn’t a terribly interesting one. Now with OZ he’s doing the same thing and it shows that Alice was not some creative masterpiece. This guy is just a pervert and this is all he knows how to do. It’s like he has some kind of huge fucking machine. Beloved stories and characters go in one side and junior high quality goth crap comes out the other.Yeah, Yeah McGee, we all know you are very angry. You should save yourself some fucking time and just wear a T-shirt that says “I am dark and brooding”.

I think McFarlane is a brilliant business man who stopped being creative years ago. There is nothing wrong with that, as I am sure he makes enough money that he doesn’t have to be creative. I like to think I would still draw even if I was rich but who knows.

My take on Brute Force:

I think the cooperative missions will be fun like Tycho said. I agree that there is no reason to play the deathmatch stuff, but it’s not like you have to pay extra for it. I honestly can’t understand how that Lizardman ever got okayed. He looks like they took him straight out of the cut scene of a low budget 1994 Playstation game.

My take on Riverworld:

Wow, that movie was shit hot. So is it going to be a series now? It ended in a really strange place.

-Gabe out

Gabe

Readers are writing in to tell me that Riverworld is a series of books. They are also telling me that the movie sucked ass. I guess I will have to go get the books and decide for myself. The next “New Jedi Order” book doesn’t come out until April 29th so I have a couple weeks to read something new. Thanks for the heads up.

-Gabe out

Tycho

Let me take a moment to extend heartfelt birthday wishes to Alex Green and Mark Wadley.

(CW)TB

Tycho

Yes, Sean Bulloch, it is also your birthday.

(CW)TB

Gabe

Some of you might remember our tale from Sakuracon about our booth being next to that of Sweet Kitty. Well we all loaded up on Japanese candy that day and our supplies have finally run out. We made a special trip over there this afternoon in order to stock up again and while we were there we had some fun with their picture taking machine.

Some of you might know Brad from the forum or from conventions. He is a good friend of ours who we have recently put in charge of Penny Arcade merchandise. He’s the one to thank for getting us off our asses and making us do the new designs. He will also be in charge of the online store as soon as that is open. Anyway, he was in the picture booth for a while and we couldn’t figure out what he was up to. This is the photo that popped out of the machine when he was done.

Is nice to know that this is the kind of guy who will be in charge of making sure your orders from the store get out to you on time.

If you live in the area do yourself a favor and hit Sweet Kitty. They have got some candy there that will knock you on your ass.

-Gabe out

Gabe

A great quote from reader Wayne regarding American McGee.

“We need to stop buying crap and crap will stop being made.”

Tycho and I had this same conversation. The fact is that Alice sold well. It’s like positive reinforcement. We need to pop him on the nose with the rolled up newspaper of commerce.

-Gabe out

Gabe

I figured instead of posting in this thread I would just answer this guys rant here. He appears to have totally misunderstood me.


My point is not that this stuff shouldn’t be made because of some moral high ground I pretend to occupy. Jesus just look at the past four years of PA. I’m saying it shouldn’t be made because it’s crap. It’s poorly done. It’s trite.

I have nothing against scary/gross shit when it’s done right. I loved dark city, I think Tim Burton is a genius, I loved the crow (the comic more than the movie)The Ring is bad ass, I could go on and on. BUT that sort of thing is easy to get wrong. It takes a special kind of person to be able to pull off something like that without it feeling juvenile.

Just my two cents.

Oh, and I expect to see you all on PSO this week. I’ll be the short red and black ranger with the big gun.

-Gabe out

Gabe

Another great mail from a reader:


What I found most tiresome is that re-interpreting Alice/Looking Glass has
already been done fifty gajillion times by artists low on creative juices.
The phrase “a surreal interpretation of Lewis Carrol’s…” should be
banned from our creative lexicon.  It’s sad that rarely do these takes on
Alice pick up on the interesting aspects of the book (the satire of
British high manners, politics, and academia; the wordplay and clever
jokes).  Jeff Noon’s _Automated Alice_ may be the only take that comes
close to respecting or cleverly adding anything to the mythos.

I’m happy that Oz at least provides a *new* universe to plunder, but your
comic pretty accurately reveals McGee as a possible one-trick pony.  It’s
all fun and games until we get American McGee’s Chronicles Of Narnia.

Regards,

brian

-Gabe out