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Tycho


Once your heart hurts for more than twenty-four hours, it’s probably time to go see somebody who knows about them.  When he originally described the sensations he was experiencing, I thought he was simply feeling an emotion, something he might find disorienting.  Nope, it was just the heart thing.

While he was appreciating the contours of his wholly custom painscape, strangely conscious of his body’s constant operation, I have managed to get back into some Call of Duty.  Though I have not played on a server that supports it yet, there is already a custom “Demolition” gametype that requires no download and injects some sanity into vanilla Search and Destroy.  The main reasons I wanted to mention CoD were that a) there is a apparently a patch coming out shortly that will add a new gametype, a Russian machine gun, and hopefully a couple new maps, and b) I had to make sure you got your hands on this tiny marvel - a mod that does nothing less than add a Friend Finder to the join screen.  There’s another cool app called nBrowse that is far more robust, but runs outside the game - it’s up to you which one of those you’d prefer.

I’ve read many reports of people dissatisfied with the Deus Ex: Invisible War demo - so did the developer apparently, as they chose to respond directly to these criticisms.  Personally, I’ve held off on Deus Ex news.  I can’t do that for all games, eventually curiosity gets the better of me, but outside of the off screen or something that gets posted in-line with the rest of the news on a site I’ve stayed fairly chaste.  I turned away when I saw it at E3, for example.  This was the sequel to Deus Ex, and I felt like I should be “saving it” for retail.  I felt like the last virgin in the world, atop a mountain, which not only accentuated my isolation but was also very cold.

And then like a day after the demo came out I was all over it, chewing and scratching like a mongoose.  Well, I’d been very good up to that point.

Most of the comments I’ve read from players have said the same thing, that they feel the simultaneous development for the Xbox and the PC has conspired to “dumb down” the entire game.  But you could tell from interviews after they had finished the Playstation 2 version that they had begun to feel, internally, that a streamlined user experience was really the way to go.  I read the interview on Gamespy, this would have been a very long time ago, obviously - but they felt like they had made some missteps in the PC original that obscured the things that they wanted clear.     

People are asking why Deus Ex: Invisible War was dumbed down, when in actuality it’s just not very good period.  I mean, maybe it’s a dumbed down shitty game.  It hardly matters.  I got in trouble with you when I called the Tron demo “shitty” without qualification, so let me be frank:  the mouse control is strangely loose, almost ethereal, like yelling your movements to a friend across the room at a loud party.  Shit doesn’t react when you shoot it.  The environment seemed spartan, like the universe had just moved in.  Performance is beyond miserable.  The tough inventory and character choices I had to make in the first game simply don’t exist in this new one.     

Of course, I only have what you have to go on - this demo, which runs miserably on my 2.4 Athlon XP, gig of RAM, Radeon 9700.  The servants who toil at gaming news establishments have said that the demo is not representative of the final game, which is supposedly very good.  Uh, that’s great.  They got theirs free, so it goes without saying that their free CD with Deus Ex on it is probably better than my blank CD-R.  I won’t buy a game that has a demo like this as its avatar, so I guess that’s kind of a pickle.

(CW)TB out.

i hear the buzz is good on them

Gabe

I just wanted to make a quick post regarding the Links 2004 review over at IGN. Obviously the review is shit since it came from IGN. In fact they actually lied in part of it.

You are able to play with two people on the same TV online; meaning, you and a buddy can hope online together. There is no team-play options, unfortunately.

While it’s true that you and your buddy can “hope” online, the team play remark is a lie. Tycho and I play Links every night and our favorite game type happens to be best ball. You take four players and divide them into two teams. Each member of the team plays a given hole and the best score is put on the card. If you fuck up a Drive or an approach shot you just have to hope that your teammate will be able to deliver.

I was gonna go line by line and tell you why their review is bullshit but I just don’t think it’s necessary. Judging by the advertisements all over their front page I’d say EA is into them for a couple hundred thousand at least. It’s no wonder they claim throughout the Links review that Tiger is a better golf game. Of course they never once mention that Links 2004 supports four players online and Tiger only supports two. They go so far as to lie about Links 2004 not supporting team games. They claim the putting is “stiff” when in reality it delivers a much more accurate putting simulation than Tiger does. In Tiger a caddy tells you to aim 6 feet past the hole and 4 inches to the right. The challenge is not in actually reading the green it comes from trying to determine the correct distances from the hole to place your aim indicator. You are not judging the break of a green you are simply trying to figure out just where 6 feet back and 4 inches right would be. Links on the other hand actually requires you to take into account the slope of the green.

Look, all you have to know is that Links 2004 offers a significantly better Golf experience than Tiger. Just look at the IGN score of 7.5 versus the reader score of 9.0. So to sum up, IGN are liars and Links 2004 is awesome.

-Gabe out

Gabe

A few of you asked for something official from the Hospital regarding our toy drive. I understand that you never can be too careful. No shame in being certain that Tycho and I weren’t just going to take the toys and move to Mexico or something. Anyway here is the official letter from the Seattle Children’s Hospital:

December 1, 2003

 

Dear Friend of Children’s Hospital:

Penny Arcade and Amazon.com are teaming up to help support Children’s Hospital with an on-line toy drive and Wish List.  Children’s is very grateful to Penny-Arcade for their dedication toward facilitating this event, and encourage support from community businesses and individuals to help make it successful.

Children’s Hospital has always remained constant in their mission to care for all children regardless of a family’s resources. Since we opened our doors in 1907, no child has ever been turned away because a family’s inability to pay. In 2003, the hospital is expected to provide over $32 million in uncompensated care.  In addition Children’s is in partnership with the University of Washington in a commitment to research. As you can see, your support literally helps us to keep our doors open to all patients.

If you have any questions about Children’s Hospital’s involvement with this event, please contact Emma Misner at (206) 987-4838.

Sincerely,

 

 

Jan Sinegal
Board of Trustees
Children’s Hospital and Regional Medical Center

 

 

In related news the first batch of toys was scheduled to be delivered to us today. However the mailman said there were simply too many packages. Something like three trucks worth I guess.  They were going to have to make a special trip out tonight or tomorrow. I’ll have pictures soon.

-Gabe out

Tycho

People bought so many toys that they could not physically deliver them?

(CW)TB

Tycho

The doctor told him it wasn’t going to blow up or anything, which seems good.

(CW)TB

Gabe

My ticker is cool. The doctor says I am healthy, which is nice to hear. She isn’t sure what caused my chest pains but says it probably isn’t my heart. Things have been going so well with Penny Arcade recently that I just assumed something bad had to happen to me soon. I had always figured it would be some rare disease that would infect my boy parts and eventually kill me. When I started having chest pains I thought for a moment that I had been focused so much on an attack from my nether regions that I totally overlooked the possibility of my heart exploding.

-Gabe out

Gabe

I have a simple little website up now with some pictures of the toys that have arrived so far. You can see the page here.

I’ll be updating it as often as I can with new pictures.

-Gabe out