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Tycho

Did any of you catch this Viacom/Activision shit?  We found it fascinating, and utilizing a mysterious procedure we converted this fascination into strip form.  Essentially, Activision is suing Viacom because Star Trek sucks.  It’s strange, because I’ve been thinking about the intersection of Videogames and Star Trek a good deal lately.  I am not the guy that knows the names of all the episodes, but I do have what I think is a healthy affection for this “franchise.”  Healthy, of course, being a relative term.

The fact is, as Activision was putting out that Press Release, I had just made realization number one: that Viacom, Paramount, whoever is making Star Trek shows and movies can no longer be trusted to fashion compelling Star Trek.  It is the fate of the Trek enthusiast to have one’s expectation of quality continually adjusted downward, and the occasional flash of satisfaction one gets is nearly overwhelming.  You’ll feel it, and you’ll wonder if you used to feel that way all the time - how good that must have been.  But it is to the point now where my standards have deteriorated to the extent that I enjoyed Star Trek: Nemesis.  I’m not saying that indicates quality, now - my enjoyment of something.  Absolutely not.  But that was decent enough Star Trek.  You see, now Star Trek has its own “Quality Continuum” divorced from the metrics we might apply to other forms of entertainment.  It must, because the alternative is too grim, admitting that Star Trek is the sort of desiccated husk an alien creature might discard.   

The license has a somewhat checkered past when it comes to Videogame adaptations.  Okay, it’s not somewhat checkered.  It is completely covered by checkers, it is, in fact, a chessboard.  I have had some fun in there, though - The Collective’s DS9:  The Fallen was mighty fine.  Also, I think that Elite Force has proven itself to be a pretty dependable series thus far.  I’m playing through Elite Force II now, well, not right now, but the levels have a durable, solid feel and they’re giving me action galore and throwing me the occasional bone where the setting is concerned.  Also, there’s like ten online game modes.  Go Ritual!

Realization number two struck me shortly thereafter.  I think that the best Star Trek we are likely to get is going to come from Activision, if it comes from anywhere.  Waiting for Trek’s cruel master to deliver something worthwhile, you’ll be waiting a long time.  Under ordinary circumstances I wouldn’t invest myself in idle fancy like this, but for some reason I maintain a bit of hope on the topic.  They could explore things like Section 31, the Federation’s secret police, in fabulous detail.  The idea of Federation Timeships seems ready-made for exploitation in a game or series of games.  Explore other races more fully, as players.  Shit, explore other genres - Star Trek is often like an old morality play, and the sorts of games we’re presented with often don’t communicate the most interesting parts of the series.  Attract a quality writer, a series writer, and start from there.  I think that gamers will gravitate towards excellent games regardless of their context. 

(CW)TB out.

so, which one are you?

Tycho

Did I just invent a new word?  Or was it already there?

In any case, the wily group known as “Free-X” has, according to this ZDNet report, released their software only method to hack the Xbox.  Apparently, the only way MS can defend against it is to release a new version of the Dashboard - which is actually fairly easy for them to do, if you have Live.  It has a difficulty index somewhere between flipping a lightswitch and opening a cupboard.

(CW)TB

Gabe

Activision should have started a class action lawsuit against Viacom. Then all of us could have signed on and got some damages from this shit. Something like this maybe?”

CLASS ACTION COMPLAINT FOR INJUNCTIVE RELIEF AND MONEY DAMAGES

1. Plaintiff, on behalf of herself/himself and all others similarly situated, seeks to enjoin the above-named company from their ongoing practice of making shitty Star Trek content. 1 Failure to create compelling Star Trek movies, television shows and books constitutes a breach of contract. In addition, the use of an awesome actor like the one and only Count Bakula in order to get fans to watch an otherwise craptacualr show constitutes a deceptive business practice. Plaintiff brings this Complaint on behalf of a class of similarly-situated dorks and geeks across the country who find themselves paying good money to sit through all the Star Trek crap Viacom has been shitting out recently . In support of her/his Complaint, Plaintiff states as follows:

Parties

 

2. Plaintiff is a geek or dork.

3. Defendant Viacom is an evil Corporation with a principal place of business in a hollowed out moon orbiting the earth and bristling with powerful weaponry, as well as Colorado. Viacom owns and operates, or otherwise controls through a network of subsidiaries, the Star Trek franchise or what is left of it.

4. Viacom is an adequate defendant class representative because, they have a fuck ton of money and they have totally boned Star Trek. In addition, Viacom is motivated to vigorously defend this action given its joint and several, if not ultimate, liability for the acts complained of herein.

-Gabe out

Tycho

Spell check that.

(CW)TB

Gabe

Well my art auction that I mentioned yesterday is still going on for a few more days. I really appreciate those of you bidding exorbitant amounts of money but I want to make sure you understand that if you win the auction, that number you bid represents the amount of real money you will need to pay me. Honestly though I am flattered that so many of you find my work so desirable. Maybe if I wasn’t such a pack rat you’d see auctions like this more often than once ever couple of years.

As I said in the last post the money earned from the auction is going to help pay for our travel to the San Diego comic-con this month. The whole PA crew will be attending this year, including all the wives. We have a very large corner booth this year in an awesome location. We are booth number 3147. We will be there for every single day of the con signing stuff and selling shirts and posters. We don’t have a signing schedule or anything, we will be there all day every day signing whatever you stick in front of us (so long as it does not burn or bite). We will also be unveiling the new and improved Wang Fu T-shirt down there. San Diego will be your first chance to get your hands on this new design. We will also try and have some of our GBA MOD skins available at our booth. Anyway, it’s gonna be a kick ass con so come out and say hi if you can.

-Gabe out

Gabe

I did spell check it asshole.

-Gabe out

Tycho

You must have a different spell-checker than I do, one that includes non-existent words.  Craptacualr?  Is that some kind of bear?

(CW)TB

Gabe

I guess I misspelled one word. I am so fucking sorry. I sure hope the spelling police don’t come and get me. Honestly I’m surprised you even saw my post, what with your busy morning of not putting up a news post until nine in the morning. Funny, the comics always go up by midnight.

-Gabe out

Tycho
The Craptacualr makes its home in high forests and dines mostly on fish and psychotropic plants.  They are poor spellers and are mystified by commas.

Gabe

I sure wish I could spend the day browsing for pictures of bears on Google instead of working on new T-shirt designs for Penny Arcade. It must be nice.

-Gabe out

Tycho

I have all kinds of pictures.

(CW)TB