I hope you're not going to get all mad if I start talking about Nintendo again.
A big part of the reason the DS thing makes me so mad is that I know come E3 they're going to be like "Here it is," and I'm going to be polishing their knobs again because it will do some fancy thing I didn't expect. They left out the important things on purpose - it just doesn't add up to me in its current form - and I have other things to worry about, but I keep mulling over their stupid crap. I fail this save every time, these companies try to start some kind of buzz and I know better but I bite anyway. I'm always on-board whenever Acclaim wants to tattoo babies or bake dogs for some new game, I'm here talking about their little trick just like they discussed in the boardroom.
See, that wasn't so bad. And look, I'm about to make it up to you.
Pork and I are playing Gunbound every night lately, a) because it's awesome and b) because we were never able to resolve his machine's issues with Call of Duty. I would feel bad for him if he weren't running a 1.2 gig machine, which is to my mind somewhat indecent. As a PC gamer, you need to respect yourself. Part of that respect is making sure that your clock speed isn't one third of the Goddamn processors out now. It's something we've talked about, I've told him about these new "stores" you can get stuff at and he just cocks his head like an animal. Anyway, so Gunbound.
I'm just going to put the link to the client at AIX here for you, you can download it while you read the rest of this because every machine that can run it should - and, as a turn-based 2D battle game with the occasional fancy effect, even Porkfry's disgusting altar of shame can manage it. Take your Scorched Earth/Artillery concept - you choose an angle and the force of a shot - add the Wormsian concept of weapons and power-ups, and then cajole whimsical Asians into drawing and animating each character, their selectable vehicles, and their collectible accessories. It's not new, by any means - it's one of those quirky online games that has likely endured the ravages of one or more Fad Cycles, like Ragnarok Online or Dinky Bomb. In any case it's completely free to play, it's addictive, and I'm on there as CWTycho. The chances of you beating me are pretty good.
I spent all day (and practically all night) Saturday playing Silent Storm and Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance II, and the short version is that they're both pretty great. The long version I'll foist upon you Wednesday and, who knows, maybe Friday. I'm wily. Oh, and also: do yourself a favor and get a hold of the Iron & Wine album "The Creek Drank The Cradle." It's the kind of music you want on the radio while you're dying in that twisted car.
(CW)TB out.
i work on my drinking
Firefly is still amazing. It’s sad that the Sci-Fi channel hasn’t stepped up to the plate and picked it up. I guess they spent all their money on Cleopatra 2525.
FF:X2 is also radical to the max. I guess technically the combat is turn based but the battles play out so fast it feels more like a real time action game. I can see how some people might be turned off by the campy story but I think its fun. I’m still new to the FF series so maybe I don’t take it quite as seriously as some might.
I tried really hard to play Gunbound this weekend but it didn’t work. The game installed fine and everything but then I tried playing it. I have an extremely low tolerance for bullshit. If I can’t figure out the controls of a game and be having fun without reading a manual, then chances are I won’t play it for more than ten minutes. I don’t mind going back to a manual to learn the advanced shit, but I want to be able to start having fun with a game the minute I pick up the controller or put my fingers on the keyboard.
Once I finally got into a game I was struggling to figure out how to play. I made a few shots that either hit the ground right in front of me or someone on my team. Also my tank seemed to be spitting up bombs all the time without any input from me. I had decided this game was shit and wasn’t worth my time, but I figured I should try and give it one more chance. So I asked for help from the others playing. They called me a N00B and told me to go play solitaire. Each game I joined after that kicked me as soon as I started asking questions. So go download Gunbound and enjoy the rich multiplayer community of assholes along with the thrilling shoot once wait for five minutes style of game play.
I have a dentist appointment coming up in a couple weeks. As anyone who has read my previous posts will know, I have some anxiety issues. The Dentist is one of those big red buttons that really gets me nervous. I went to a new dentist a few days ago when I started getting a tooth ache. I explained to them over the phone and then again when I got there that I was very nervous about dentists. They were all super nice and when they determined that I had to come back for a root canal they could tell I was really worried. They prescribed Ativan for me to take before my appointment.
As Tycho will tell you, one of the other things I am paranoid about is drugs of any kind. I yelled at a lady at a Jamba Juice one time after she offered some kind of supplement or additive for my smoothie. I think I said something to the effect of, “I don’t want any fucking cocaine in my apple juice you drug peddling whore!” So the prescription for Ativan made me really nervous. Which is ironic since it was prescribed to calm my anxiety. I started doing some research and found out that it has some really serious side effects when taken for long periods of time. I keep telling myself I’ll only be taking it one day and so that stuff doesn’t apply to me. I made the doctor promise me my brain would not turn to jelly and slide out my nose.
A while ago I got over my fear of alcohol. Now I’m taking drugs. Tycho must be proud.
-Gabe out
Let me tell you how I got into it, and I suggest you replicate a similar scenario.
First of all, don't start by yourself. Download Teamspeak or Ventrilo or Roger Wilco and get a friend who plays it to help you out. I spent easily the first half-hour just swearing at Pork and Korea and other entities I imagined were responsible for my suffering until I figured it out. The game is best when playing with friends anyway, like virtually all games. Also, having someone online to discuss the astonishingly stupid statements you will undoubtedly hear dulls the edge somewhat. If you don't have that sort of situation, if human company eludes you please pop by the FAQ at Gunbound-HQ and familiarize yourself with the situation you are about to enter. You should do that anyway, really - learn that the arrow keys and the spacebar are really all you need to proceed, read an analysis of the different "mobiles" and get an idea which one might be right for you.
Gabe does not tolerate games, if it does not provide joy on demand he sees no reason to trifle with it. That's a perfectly functional entertainment strategy, in my opinion. On the other hand, I know that sometimes you need to meet an otherwise inpired game halfway on some points. I guess if you're going to have a site about videogames you should probably have someone that embodies each of these qualities.
(CW)TB
My four year wedding anniversary is coming up in March and Kara and I would like to take a really nice vacation together. I know one year is paper and I think four years is volcanic rock, so we are thinking probably Hawaii. Anyway I figured I’d check and see if any of you readers out there happen to be travel agents, or maybe you just own a private jet and a giant mansion in Hawaii that you never use. My previously mentioned anxiety tends to keep my feet firmly on the ground and usually within a few miles of my house. I’ve never actually planned a trip like this before so I don’t really know what’s involved. If you are in a position to help us chart a course to the Hawaiian Islands please contact kara
-Gabe out
