We wouldn't believe it, though - not in face of reviews so unchained in their joy as to nearly be songs. We were even able to endure the positive e-mails sent by readers! Eventually it was thrown on the GameFly list, but not with care or genuine interest, it was in more of a taunting manner. Game, I will rent you only when the world sings your praises in unison, and the cost to me is (for all practical purposes) nonexistent.
I am never at a loss for something to play, between the unstoppable creative torrent of the mod community and the output of a gigantic multinational industry my time is usually spoken for in absolute terms. So, games I'm enthusiastic about get played, and then games I'm not sure about get played. A PS2 action game based on a resuscitated license still warm with the memories of a solitary childhood is bound to fall through the cracks, despite my enthusiasm for sentient machines, because Massive games tend to absorb any excess time.
No knowledge of the new shows is required to enjoy this game - you'll know that the Decepticons are the bad guys as soon as they start shooting you for no reason. We expressed dissatisfaction with the new cartoons cartoon as you might recall, but I will allow that at twenty-six years old I am probably not their target audience. They're trying to sell robots to children. They convinced me years ago that I could never have enough Goddamn robots, so their payload has been delivered. Robot deficiency is one of the central themes of my life. Mission accomplished, I suppose.
Transformers is just the kind of solid, satisfying game that you hope gets a sequel so they can build on some of the concepts. Understand this: where I might abhor the concept of Minicons in a cartoon, where Autobots and Decepticons pantomime the acquisition of toys in a television program already fraught with marketing messages, in a videogame it's absolutely fucking fresh. So, you have your basic action platformer. It's using a license you remember liking, so it's kickin'. All these games make you collect something, in Mario it's Stars, in Banjo Kazooie it's music notes or something. In this, you collect two things:
Minicons are terribly desirable, and I burn with an unchecked need to obtain them. Every powerup you would get in another game of this type takes the form of a Minicon in this one - so every weapon, special ability, passive defense, everything is from something you have collected. And, since you can only slot four of these things, you need to be a bit choosy. We thought we'd stumbled on a sort of Ultimate configuration recently, leading me to believe that the system was pretty cool but had some loopholes, but then our victory in some huge fights was held up precisely due to our reliance on certain abilities.
Datacons are essentially special feature unlocks - so, it's things like a new version of the Theme Song, or all the full-motion video in the game featuring the different characters. On top of that, you have the actual transformation diagrams of several toys that you can run through step by step, or comics you can read right from the menu. The earth beneath you isn't going to crack and honey isn't going to pour out. But, there's some neat extras that are actually worth looking at.
The robots in the Transformers game feel as ponderous as they should, while maintaining an organic sensibility - they're heavy equipment and I want that to matter. Switching into vehicle mode actually gives you a very different feel, they didn't try to gloss over the vehicle controls to make them easier. There are three Autobots in the initial roster, Optimus, Hot Shot, and Red Alert, who play differently enough to make it an actual choice. The environments often require the use of vehicle mode for Dukes of Hazzard style jumps, and so taking a ramp, transforming in mid-air over a group of enemies is a beautiful thing that you can cherish frequently.
There is some slowdown at times, okay, it slows down a lot, but if you saw what it was trying to do you'd probably understand. Long draw distance coupled with (in some cases) well over thirty enemies, some of which have alternate modes themselves, and everything operated on by some kind of physics calculation. Physics in games we've sort of some to expect by now, particularly on the PC - they don't really shock me these days unless they accurately simulate something on accident. Here, where every combatant is actually a sort of living machine, the contortions generated by the physical simulation actually look right.
They even try to communicate the personality of your team in the menu, when they're just sitting there - Red Alert maintaining his weapon, the brash Hot Shot nodding his head to some inaudible beat. I haven't even begin to discuss some of the massive bosses, and I won't cover them with any specificity. Honestly, I wish that I could forget so I could see them again without prior knowledge.
(CW)TB out.
roasted hot with heat
There is a new storyline over there which features many, many different online cartoonists, so chances are good that you will see someone in your bookmarks "sent up," as the saying goes, for humorous effect.
(CW)TB
Two, check out these shots of what they're calling Jagged Alliance 3D. Rowrr.
Also, I told the Relic Universe guys I would pass a link their way - here you go. They've got some shots from E3 taken with a camera that show the character customization, among other things.
(CW)TB
For me the worst part of the game in the bullshit you have to sit through between trips to the Wanzer shop and the battles. The story is so needlessly complicated and boring that I found myself skipping through the conversations as fast as I could. I watch the occasional cinema in order to get the gist of what's going on in the game, but honestly I just want to get to the fighting. If it wasn't for the convoluted dialogue you have to wade through in order to get to the meat of the game I'd say it was nearly perfect.
While I played Front Mission on Saturday Kara sat next to me on the couch and played solitaire on the laptop. At one point she commented that every time she looked up I was in the Wanzer customization screen or the pilot upgrade screen. She was honestly curious if I had purchased a new war game or some kind of robot shopping sim. I have to admit that the interface for upgrading and customizing your units is ponderous at best but it's still probably my favorite part of the game. I can spend thirty minutes just trying to pick the right set of arms for one of my Wanzers and love every second of it. You can spend an hour messing with the various components of your Wanzer and never even get to the fucking weapons. From sniper rifles to giant metal spikes there is no shortage of armaments to choose from. The payoff to all this setup is watching a Mech you've lovingly customized from the ground up perform exactly as you hoped he would. When the new quicker legs you purchased combine with your pilots upgraded evade skill and your Wanzer ducks a shotgun blast it all feels worth it.
I'm also a big fan of the actual combat in Front Mission. You can unlock bonus missions and other extras by completing certain missions in 15 turns or less but I honestly don't know who that's for. I may just be stupid but I find many of the missions I'm at now taking upwards of 100 turns. I won't try and tell you it isn't frustrating to die on turn 97 but so far I've never been discouraged to the point of wanting to quit the game entirely. Each time I've felt like I understood what I did wrong and I had an idea of how I could refit my Wanzers in order to make better use of them. The IGN review claims that this sort of trial and error is frustrating and that more information about a given level before it started would be helpful. I agree 100%, and that's why I got a copy of the strategy guide. For most of the games I play I just don't think they are necessary, but once I started getting into RPG's and turn based tactical games I found them to be unbelievably helpful. I'm not going to buy a guide for Onimusha 3 that tells me how to get the secret Panda suit, but in a game like Front Mission it's really nice to have a huge chart that shows me all the parts for my Wanzer along with their stats all divided into easy to navigate categories. Throw in tons of great tips, briefings for each level and a completely useless instruction manual and I feel like the strategy guide is a legitimate companion to this sort of game.
Does the fact that the strategy guide solves some of the problems with Front Mission mean the game isn't any good? I guess it might point towards some poor design decisions. Does that mean you should avoid this title? Well I guess that depends on why you play video games. Personally I play games in order to have fun, not to pick apart their flaws. With a strategy guide I find Front Mission to be extremely fun. The only thing standing between you and hours of tactical bliss is a thin book full of beautiful art. The decision seems easy to me. You're welcome to send me mail and complain that you shouldn't have to buy a guide in order to enjoy a game. I might not reply right away though, since I'll probably be having a good time playing Front Mission.
It was never a big deal to begin with and it was easy enough to forget. He continues to obsess about it though, judging by his most recent blog entry. As always you guys seem determined to point out to me anytime someone says something about Penny Arcade. I always follow your links too, out of some sick desire to see what people are saying about me. In this particular case this guy was being a real ass. He actually said this towards the end of his rant:
I'm counting the days until Gabe's unborn child grows up to be just like him, and treats him like trash, because I have an innate appreciation of irony and I'm willing to wait for the payoff.
I think that's kind of a fucked up thing to say.
At any rate this post should give him something to obsess about for another six months.
