We picked up an iPod Nano for a friend of ours who is heading out to Basic Training. What I told the clerk about his ultimate destination might have been a bit presumptive. There's also Afghanistan.

Clinton doesn't like spiders. I told him they've got a spider over there that is so large you can saddle it and ride him around. I also suggested that I'd heard soldiers stationed in Iraq were living in the shed carapaces of these apocalyptic beasts, specifically in the thorax. He only looked resolute. He looked like a man with the strength and determination to sleep inside a giant arachnid. I had never seen this Clinton before. Was that the national anthem I heard? The profile of his face was tall, and cragged - a thing you could climb.

Every time I try to capture what is so amazing about him, and I have been attempting it for longer than I will admit, I get the feeling that I am eulogizing him.

One of the first things he ever invited me to was Karaoke, not Karaoke Revolution but just regular old mortal Karaoke, and his send off was at the same place. This involved his friend Brandon signing him up to sing songs that were far too high for him, indeed, too high for any whole man. There are eunuchs who could not manage these songs without difficulty. He hit notes that made my own testicles shiver with fear. One of them tried to make a tiny noose with the Vas Deferens and hang itself right there in my scrotum.

Clinton Peterson spent his time going from group to group in attendance, mediating wrongs and making peace. He really held his shit together until his sister lost it, at which point other people lost it. Not me, though. I'm writing this, and it can end any way I want.

(CW)TB out.

led secyurda curyamao

Clinton's mom is a librarian, so, I mean, all hail. She loves a webcomic called Unshelved, which is all about things that make sense to her. Where we might have a shirt that says "Rogues Do It From Behind," they might have a shirt that says "What Would Dewey Do?"

I was meaning to link it anyway, but their strip today is actually about Penny Arcade, so... I'll link it twice?

(CW)TB

One of the stories we are often asked to tell at a convention is the one regarding our ill-fated first book. I don’t mind re-telling it because it really is a very funny story. I always say that we had a difference of opinion with the publisher. We thought we should be paid for the book and he thought he should keep all the money and move to Alaska. That always gets a chuckle. Inevitably someone in the back shouts “what’s his address?” This also gets a big laugh. Now I know it’s just a joke. I mean, you guys would never beat someone up for us… but I’ve also never posted the man’s address.

When I had my little on air altercation with BJ Shea you guys once again leapt to our defense. You contacted the show’s advertisers in such huge numbers that I actually received a call from the station director demanding I remove my post and threatening legal action if I didn’t call off the dogs. The fact is I never told you guys to do anything but I guess I should have expected it. I’m still sort of shocked by how fiercely some of you will defend us.

I got a call last night not from Harlan himself but from a sort of go between. Apparently some of you tried to destroy his website yesterday. I’m trying really hard not to smile. I certainly appreciate that many of you are pissed at Harlan but it’s really not fair to take it out on his webmaster. If you’d like to post on his boards you’re certainly free to do it, I’m not going to try and stop you. I think it’s important to keep your vicious insults directed at Harlan himself though.

Since the con I’ve had the opportunity to learn a little bit more about Mr. Ellison. Many of you have sent me stories about him that are pretty amazing. He’s certainly very well known in the Sci-Fi community. Honestly I think it would be cool to be friends with him. I think he might know Timothy Zahn.

-Gabe out

When we were at MIT, which I will eventually describe in unerring detail because the people there were amazing, I fielded a question near the end that I didn't answer to anyone's satisfaction. There wasn't enough time, and I'm not entirely sure I understood it. He wanted to know what I thought of Greg Costikyan's manifestos, specifically the two part (self-admitted) screed available at The Escapist.

Essentially, what did I think of his new business mechanism to do away with publishers and so forth. I'd read the article, it had diagrams of this new relationship, but it didn't really stay memory resident. I came up with the same system while drinking, hanging out with the guys who made Eets. Having a good idea isn't really worth anything if all it does is foment unrest on your blog or flit in the unbounded realms of your mind.

I mentioned at the "lecture" that a system to make the PC games industry more sensible and equitable is great, but I don't know what good it does for the hundreds of millions of people playing or developing games for proprietary systems. Xbox Live Arcade is an interesting move to create an "indie" digitally delivered game scene on a home console. I'd love to see what those contracts look like before I started praising it, though.

This could move very easily into a tirade against Greg Costikyan, the message board messiah, if he hadn't decided to take an actual risk himself in order to manifest his supernatural utopia. Best of luck to him. Them revolutions is tough business.

(CW)TB