Having arrived home during the darkest hour of the night, this update is not exactly timely. I hope that one more bout of self-indulgence - heaped, as it is, upon the others, piled above shoulder-height - will not mar the union we have so long cherished.
Even faulty equipment cannot bar us from our ancient duty, and even with only a camera, a table, and a pen at our disposal we shall pierce our gathered enemies. Gabriel struggled to retain his lunch as various aggressors took chisel to his beloved space opera. We saw a Green Lantern Jedi, which - and please don't confirm this to my associate - is something that could probably work. There was also what appeared to be an entirely reverent Orthodox Jew plus lightsaber, which might be a tougher task, but I flatter myself that I am up to the challenge.
There's a lot of stress associated with the convention that simply didn't exist this time. Physically, there is exhaustion, yes. The muscles associated with smiling are bolstered, to extent that my cheek alone could probably kick your ass, if you had been drinking or perhaps if my cheek got the drop on you. But in person, beyond the strange Internet rays that attenuate the inbuilt social powers of our species, I feel a pressure to behave like a kind of Webcomics Ambassador. I don't know exactly why. The peacemaking gene, the supplicator, is always present. This goes beyond that. I decided before boarding the plane that this year I was going to be "As Nasty As I" wanted to "Be," in the manner of the 2 Live Crew, and I behaved in exactly the same way I have every other time, only now it wasn't a chore. I always imagined that if I did not actively suppress it, some dark force would leap to the fore. I'm a little disappointed that I do not play host to a malevolent Dark Force, but other than that, best con ever - and upon every measured axis. I have heard the same from every other person. I have met so many, and also secured the old alliances - let me invent a way to list them that honors each.
With readers, there is no chore associated with it. I feel only the urge to look and be better than I am, just as anyone would when presented with their employer. The fact that my employer is a distributed entity that arrives in (over the course of a convention like this) more than four thousand unique and challenging guises is my own issue to deal with.
At the end of the con, we were forced to contend with forty-foot tall Boss Reader(!) who, after cycling through three forms of successively greater moisture, stole a poster and then ran away. We thought at first that he didn't know they weren't free, but he stole the poster that had the price written on it. He is either a thief who actively enjoys the practice, or he thought it was a poster signed by the creative team behind our comic, Messieurs "Twelve" and "Dollars."
(CW)TB out.
While we languished in the terminal awaiting news of our delayed flight, we devoured any kind of stimuli - including expensive airport magazines. I believe the advertisement we present you with today is from Wired originally, but there were many such magazines, and after six days engaged in various kinds of labor I must say they ran together.
In any event, let us now thank ViewSonic for inaugurating a new site feature: Admonishments. That seems like something I would make up, but no, I suggested we call it the Adversary. The name is pure Gabe. You are correct - the one who pretends to shudder and sigh when I use a word he hasn't heard on American Idol.
There is nothing beyond the commentary in the strip to say about the ad, other than to establish that it is ridiculous in purely general terms. I suppose there is also the implied warning that your own horrific advertisement is next. When placing your next skull or turntable, you are hereby urged to think carefully.
I never got away from the booth to see it this year, but at last year's con The Behemoth had an early version of a four player brawler in the form of Final Fight or Knights of The Round. A couple of years ago, I was excited to see that they'd built a team to take their deadly Alien Hominid to retail on all platforms, but I get the impression that the experience was pretty sub-par: from the looks of it, they're moving completely over to Xbox Live Arcade with their projects. Once the Wii and the PS3 deliver their own online channels, maybe we'll see them there as well - but for the moment both a widescreen edition of Alien Hominid and a much more robust version of their brawler (now called Castle Crashers) are both hitting the 360. I can't express how hot this is. We've moved from "Pop 3" puzzlers to fast-paced, four player assaults like the Behemoth project and Gastronaut's Small Arms, to say nothing of insane basketball fantasies or whatever this thing is. I knew when I played Marble Blast Ultra in multi that there was a lot more that could be done, but I have to admit being surprised by some of these developments.
If you'd like to hear more about Castle Crashers from the guys themselves, Game Informer has a refreshing interview on tap.
I have discussed Sword of the Stars on more than one occasion, and now there's a publicly available demo, which means my excruciating prose is no longer required. There were a couple weeks there where all I played was the beta build, and even with limited races and technology there's a significant amount of game here. I understand that the demo has forty-star map to play on, and though custom games can go much larger than that a "mere" forty stars still represents a significant conflict.
Also, because we were gone when the prospect of a Horde Paladin or Alliance Shaman was verified: it is almost one-hundred percent pure bullshit.
(CW)TB out.
I'd gotten to Ugly Hill when, looking down at Paul's post, I saw Mike Mignola's unmistakable art. I had heard from our own editor at Dark horse that Mike was doing something completely unexpected, something called The Amazing Screw on Head, and it's apparently leapt from comics to animation. Let me echo Ugly Hill's own desperate plea: watch this pilot. Fill out their survey. I wonder if getting the type of television we want is actually as easy as telling them.
(CW)TB
Have you moved? Please let Mike Fehlauer, our resident lorekeeper, know what your new address is so that it may be entered into the codex. Drop him a line with the subject line "PAX Address Change." If you click that link there, I have already filled that shit out.
Have you pre-registered, but are not unable to come for some reason? First, know that I will pour out a small portion of Bawls upon the baking sidewalk in your fond remembrance. Next, please mail refunds@acteva.com so that you can get your moneys back.
We talked a little bit about PAX and other stuff when GameTrailers came by the booth at San Diego. I was having a hard time at the beginning because I had only eaten lemonade and cookies all morning, and when she kept asking how things were going, each time I used the opportunity to hatch some new plot. I am sorry! Sometimes I do not take things seriously.
(CW)TB
