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Tycho

The enforced revelry period has finally come to a close.  Thank Christ.

There was a conflux of events that lead to Gabriel’s World of Warcraft recidivism, and they should be detailed so that future generations may avoid the black pit of his toil.  He once made a card for the CCG based on his character Lt. Commander (sigh) Dudefella that depicted him in the PVP gear he had earned over weeks of honor grinding.  The moment he broke into Outland, however, strange pigs were dropping better things than he had earned - a phenomenon we described, appropriately enough, on a garment.  His precision ensemble began to slough away as he replaced it with whatever spectral lingerie he pulled off his kills.  Add to this the unavoidable fact of his profession - enchanter - and his old equipment was being obliterated immediately.  Enchanters don’t see any item in its current shape, which is to them a kind of irrelevant cosmic accident.  All they see are the weird dusts and mystical shards an item may be distilled into.  The effect this had on his formerly resplendent getup is a vibe somewhere between pimp and clown.     

Blizzard has since changed how honor grinding works - they’ve converted honor into a kind of money, instead of a means of gaining ranks, and they’re giving out more of it.  Once he saw how easy it was to earn, though, he started to set his sights on more fabulous garb than he had worn previously.  Now he feels that by hitting level seventy and creating something called an "Arena Team," he will be able to secure even more fanciful regalia.  He is now playing the game exclusively to dress his figurine, a sequence of events I could never have foreseen. 

The holiday portion of the onslaught is now done, but Gamer Christmas - the first quarter festooned with the remaining delights - now looms large.  There’s a tremendous amount of marrow left for the aficionado.  Tender shoots like Culdcept Saga crop up there, too gentle to survive in this year’s brutal crush.  Bizarre Creations is dropping The Club, a game whose mystery is finally beginning to crack.  Super Smash is already rolling deep.  Harvey Birdman, Devil May Cry, and Lost Odyssey have also found their way into this dappled glade.  The sequel to Condemned hits in February, a retooled Army of Two will also see release…  If you stretch this assessment into the beginning of April, temperatures begin to rise sharply.  January, February, and March have become some high silo, a place to store games up for the dry season. 

(CW)TB out.

  you don’t even got to bring your paper out

Gabe

I’ve gone through all the Dickerdoodle pictures I received and I’ve got some good ones to share. It was too hard to pick just one winner so I ended up picking a top three and they will all get a brand new Nintendo DS.

First let’s start with the runners up though.


This mans fervor is impressive.




I know I didn’t ask for vagaina cookies but come on, that’s awesome.




The "Barbra Walters" filter on this one makes it look so classy.




Is cookie porn a real thing?




He just seems so Innocent. Like maybe this is his first dickerdoodle.



See! Size really doesn’t matter.



Sadly he choked to death shortly after this picture was taken.



She’s ambitious and I respect that.



I’m pretty sure this was actually their Christmas card.




Alright now on to the winners. Remember each of these chefs will receive their very own Nintendo DS.

-3rd Place -

These guys win for sheer size. That’s just a lot of Dickerdoodle.



-2nd Place-

This one is just awesome. The presentation alone is great but then you start seeing little details like the penis reference photos.



-1st Place-

I fucking love this photo. We can tell by her shirt that her dad has forced into helping make these cookies. We can also tell that she is not amused. His expression is actually unreadable. Is he confused? Is he angry? I have no idea what he’s thinking but it’s priceless. I also love that with some extra dough he made the Quake symbol. So rad.



Thanks to everyone who entered. I hope you all enjoyed your Dickerdoodles. Winners, I’ll be getting in touch with you so I can get your info for the prizes.

-Gabe out