Close


Tycho

As occasionally happens, our conversation continued after the previous strip, nourished by the rich loam of the Star Wars Expanded Universe.  You can get pretty far out there and still remain canonical.  I had a bit in there about the pungent natural oils a wookiee paw might secrete, but I removed it because it couldn’t be supported by the text.  I can’t be titillated fully unless my erotic fantasy realms are internally consistent.  I’ve had to disentangle myself from a Trandoshan 3-way (“hrokk’nos”) because there was something seriously wrong with their bandoleers.

Having spent the entire weekend up to my eyes in games which are Free To Play (in the same way a nightcrawler knotted on a fishhook is “free to bite”) I started to “get” it in a way I hadn’t before.  I was juggling Spiral Knights and Dragon Nest, wondering which one I should play, when it occurred to me that these games were designed to create precisely this kind of indecision.

Guild Wars was able to exist on a similar axis because it eschewed the monthly charge, in an era where the Monthly Charge was an assumption.  I can’t tell you how many times between games I installed the (freely available) client to visit old haunts.  I synced up my new box with my Chrome account, and a few link appeared on my bookmark bar to games I hadn’t played in months.  Being Free To Play games, one of which installed directly from the browser window, all it took was the mildest form of curiosity in a bored moment to kick off a two day jag.

“Looks Good For A Browser Game” is rapidly becoming a nonsense piece of terminology.  Putting completely aside the advent of a strong Unreal Engine implementation, if you play Spiral Knights at max res with AA turned up, you won’t have much to complain about.  Dragon Nest, too, understands what it’s up against: like a velociraptor, it must do battle with great creatures on its own terms, and it does this by being beautiful and fast.  It’s not quite as turn-key as Spiral Knights, but it’s not onerous by any means, and the payment one receives from its frenetic speed more than balances the books.

Where both of these games excel is in their moment to moment play, which we may describe as “play” without the hedging we must do when describing an MMO.  That was the strangest bit of the weekend.  When called upon to describe these two games, I said that they were “like playing a videogame.”  I didn’t entirely understand what I had said in fullness.  If these are videogames, what does that say about the exemplars of the genre?

(CW)TB out.

he’s not much for words

Tycho

First Party has returned, and we’re back with the 2.0 version of the polo.  What does that mean?

Here’s what we kept from v1.0:
The style — Still two buttons, still has the First Party logo embroidered on the chest, still has the blue First Party tag on the sleeve.
The weight — We liked the sturdy, 100% cotton of the first polos, which are thicker than many other human shirts.  We kept that weight.

Here’s what we changed for the v2.0:
The material — These are made of a finer cotton than the v1.0s.  If you want the dirty details, the v1.0s were “carded-cotton.” These are “combed-cotton.”  The upshot is that they are softer/sturdier.
Pre-shrunk — The v2.0 polos have been pre-treated against shrinkage.  So these can be worn and abused like normal laundry and they will still keep their size.
New colors — We dropped the bright blue and red and replaced them with more muted colors:  “Slate Blue” and the “Cardinal Red”.  Suggested “Bloodreaverrr Crimson,” got shot down.
Vented hem (?) — This is that little triangular slit that’s at the bottom of some shirts of this type.  It makes them a little more comfortable to sit in and (in case it is necessary for a dress code) far more comfortable to wear tucked in.

What we’ve got is a soft, sturdy, comfortable polo with something called a “breathable pique weave.” It’s comfortable right out of the box, and with each wash only grows more comfortable, until you and the shirt become synonyms.

It seemed like it would be fun or cool or both to offer an “upgrade” program, in keeping with our Version Number nomenclature.  Here’s how it works:
– People who bought a v1.0 polo can “upgrade” to a new v2.0 for free. (Yay!)
– You can either cut out the chest emblem, or mail us the entire shirt as proof of purchase.…
– Then, attach the emblem to this form: http://hw1.pa-cdn.com/pa/merch/fppoloupgrade.pdf
– Send the completed form to the PA Warehouse.  (The address is on the form.)
– If you’re outside the US, the polo is still free, but we need you to share some of the shipping cost with us.  So you will need to pay your part of the shipping here: http://store.penny-arcade.com/products/fpship, then include that order number on your form.
– This offer is good until 6/30/2012.

Okay? Okay.

(CW)TB

Gabe

I picked up the New Tiger Woods today and I have to say I’m really impressed. I’ve only played a few rounds but I am really enjoying the changes to the swing mechanic this year. I have not tried the Kinect controls yet but I’ll give that a try tonight and let you all know how it goes. Honestly though this is the first Tiger game in a few years that I can see myself investing some serious time into.

One of the new features this year is a Country Club option. As fas as I can tell it’s essentially calns for golf. If you play as a part of a country club you can earn bonus status points and coins. The club itself will also level up over time. You can have tournaments and even challenge other clubs I believe. I’m not too sure of all the details just yet but I went ahead and started one called the Penny Arcadia Country Club. It’s a club for PA readers and you can use the password wombat to join. I assume since I’m playing on the 360 that you’d need to be doing the same in order to join.

-Gabe out

Tycho

I was talking about how you could upgrade your original Polo a couple days ago, and said you should just cut out the logo from the front of the shirt as a proof of purchase.  This was mainly because it seemed way cheaper than shipping us the whole shirt!  But if you really want to send us the whole shirt, that’s no problem; we will make sure it passes into a new stage of life with grace and dignity.  This is actually something that will happen!  We will really do that.  It’s not like when your dad tells you that your dog lives on a farm now or some shit when he’s actually buried under the new driveway.

That got dark; it got dark quick.  This is why you shouldn’t have me do the merchandise announcements, guys!!!

(CW)TB