The latest strip is up. Coolest Dad ever? By comparison, my own father is like a drunken, toothless hobo gumming a hot dog.
The disparity between the actual quality of Attack of the Clones and reports of that quality is so out of whack as to impugn the entire industry of opinion. I’m happy to put that out knowing full well it undermines my entire position - you should be taking our opinions with a grain of salt so small that another grain of salt could take it with something. If it was up to me, you’d throw your computer away, find a Commodore 64 at a garage sale, and be perfectly happy playing Archon, Wasteland, and Dragon Wars for the rest of your days. And I wouldn’t look to a person who only eats things out of the Star Wars Cookbook as an oracle. Maybe, despite everything they’ve done to antagonize and insult the player, you’ll be the guy who gets a kick out of Halo. Who knows? We’re just assholes with a webpage. The people in the paper, they’re assholes with typewriters. The people you see on television are assholes with some kind of jaw problem that makes them smile all day. They might need more calcium.
My position is now that I read reviews as a form of entertainment and do not endeavor to actually edify myself with their content. So, reviewers: be more bawdy! Talk about balls and use the f-word.
Aside from the Tribes Series, I think we probably got the vast proportion of our kicks from Quake 2 CTF. I was about to say there were no nits to pick, but there is the one: we were never satisfied with the grapple being an actual weapon, as opposed to the off-hand utility it had taken the form of in earlier incarnations of Threewave. That’s fine, we just played on Liquid!, which had that enabled. I felt a rush of nostalgia noting that the latest version of Threewave CTF was out, and I’ll probably reinstall Quake 3 - again - just to celebrate. I recall that in the very first versions of CTF for Quake, no numbers after it, just Quake, you just played it in the regular old levels, and it still managed to be really great. That’s something one rarely sees anymore - in the interests of balance, which is, in my opinion, a very good interest to have - modern CTF maps are perfectly symmetrical. I’m not saying it was better before, but it was certainly interesting for each team to have a unique lair.
The Afterburner - you may recall our comic on the subject, it’s that light-mod for your GBA - is finally starting to ship out, I received mine just yesterday. I have no soldering iron, and also no steady hand, I’m like a large monkey really, so this weekend I’ll probably head over to Gabe’s and we’ll get it installed. The kit itself is a beyond professional production - I mean, I expected that everything would perform as advertised, but I imagined the instructions that came along with it to be a serviceable set of folded photocopies or something. The actual booklet is a fourteen page, full-color affair with lucid diagrams and human language. I’ve received very positive reports from readers who have managed to get it installed - a subset of those are still satisfied, but strongly caution their fellow readers against a hasty installation. For me, I see my GBA as having a severe, nay, terminal defect. This “operation” is really its only chance for survival, so even if it comes out of the whole thing all wonky, I mean… It’s fucked up already, in my opinion. It was fucked up when I bought it. They all are.
on second thought, i just fucking wished he would die