Space Is The Place
Word that something called the Florida Family Association had imagined some alternate universe version of Star Wars: The Old Republic was simply too juicy a vittle to resist. They’re clearly obsessed with RuPaul, I know that much. Presumably, being a Florida Family Associater involves a tremendous amount of Ru-search. A nontrivial portion of their conceptual argument is grounded in the mental image of a cyborg drag queen version of Darth Vader rendered in such excruciating detail that it is clearly an act of erotic worship as opposed to moral outrage.
I can’t truck with this kind of ignorance. I just want to grab them, and shake them, and say to them The Old Republic takes place thousands of years before the birth of Anakin Skywalker, the ill-starred boy who will one day become Darth Vader. The homophobia is also bad.
My thick, exquisite iMac slab has been pulled up from the roots, decoupled from the desk altogether and placed in the corner of the room as though it were being punished. It’s not, as much as its Siberian exile may appear to be an act of censure. I loved it, as I have repeatedly said. But as potent a wedge as the mobile iOS might be, the Desktop axis of this creature is simply a well-behaved computer. In this matter, as in others, politeness is insufficient as a virtue.
A PC Version of some scrappy, Kickstarted indie gem where you play a Garbage Man in a lightly satirized version of J. R. R. Tolkien’s The Lord Of The Rings (MAKE THIS) isn’t going to be a “stretch reward,” something you get if you’re able to overfund a project. It’s going to be an assumption. I don’t want to ask if there’s going to be a Mac version of something incredible anymore. That’s not a good time investment. I would rather have the thing, and there’s a way to do that.
So, yeah: I traded one cable, a power cable, for… one, two, three, like… Let me get down there and count them. There are now fully eight cables. The exhaust port is hot on my calf. There is nothing beautiful about this computer, nothing, except perhaps what happens on the screen; I think I might be okay with that.