The Last Christmas, Page Three
Implacably, The Last Christmas
on. This is the eternal problem with giving the reins
of our work over to the sly forces of continuity:
will arise that seem to demand comment, but we’re doing stuff.
Luckily, this is the odd scenario where what we’re doing kind of
works. If you want to conflate Electronic Arts and a monstrous,
unkillable behemoth engaged in a worldwide orgy of consumption, well,
Something else the annual We’re Right awards does, just as purely tertiary functionality, is give us an opportunity to catalogue the year’s releases in a way that can be referred to at some point in the future. That’s probably a tradition worth maintaining.
Without equivocation or flourish, this year in gaming was the r0x0r.
Indeed, the rocking was so complete that I didn’t have time to play everything. We had other projects, like Child’s Play and the birth of a human being, but it is our job and indeed our passion to play everything that comes out and we were still unable to accomplish it. I never got to play the sequel to Viewtiful Joe. I never got to play Baten Kaitos, even though it is a card based game with cards that age and change while they sit in your inventory! I honestly don’t know what happened there.
I’ve just now, in the past few days, had an opportunity to play Knights of the Old Republic II. It’s been excellent thus far. Should it be on the top ten list? I couldn’t tell you. I know that you can fall right through the world geometry. But it seemed like if I was going to present you with a list of ten games, but I hadn’t actually gotten my hands on a few of the big ones, I should let you know. If those are some of your favorites, just put them in the list somehwere. I’ll never know, and you can be right.
There’s also games that were just outside the holy ten, camped on its wild edge. These would be games like Katamari Damacy, which is excellent and unstoppable, but so defiant of traditional play that there’s no standard location for it, it’s so surreal and steeped in wonder that putting it in with other games seems unnatural. Anyway, it’s just outside the top spots, but it’s number one and also every other number (and letter) in its own ethereal continuum. Mario Power Tennis is perfect, even without the many accoutrements, some of which add a lot of value ot the player. It’s on the edge as well. Transformers for the PS2 isn’t one of the year’s best games, but it is the only game that lets you jump over a cliff and then transform in mid air and shoot a guy. It seems like that should be recognized. Sid Meier’s Pirates is easily “Number 11,” pawing at the door and begging to be let in. Because it is called Pirates, it’s the sort of game that a well-meaning relative might get for their gamer nephew. If it should appear under the tree, stand to your feet immediately and recognize that person. They have done you a mighty favor.
With a heavy heart, we are trudging toward Spokanistan today. Updates will be delivered as per the usual schedule, as I desperately need something to keep my mind off that barren expanse. If you’ve never been there, the things I say about it probably strike you as hyperbolic. Let me assure you that I have been metered in my derision. For example, I never spoke of the black idol that juts up from the lava at the corner of Francis and Division. It draws all men with honeyed lies and binds them in eternal service.
these prescriptions got too many uses