I think this First 15 was one of my favorites. Check out Tycho and I playing the first bit of Resident Evil 6 HD.
Also I decided to get into the X-Wing miniatures game on Saturday. I have already been to the hobby store twice since then. I’m in real trouble here folks.
I want to emphasize from the outset that I bear these birds no ill will. I am a friend to birds. And I completely understand why they might love my fucking vent: I live in a what is functionally a giant tree, of comparatively cavernous internal volume, and it has a little hole in it which occasionally emits warm, fragrant air. If I made nests, I would make one inside this vent. Like, forthwith.
I had rats in my house once, and there is something about the sound of an unseen claw scraping that peels the skin off your head. It could not be less okay. I’m down with the occasional chirrup. But I was given the task of evicting these interlopers, and I was surprised at just how granular the various fraternities formed around this issue are. I had to call a bunch of different places, revolving a kind of cosmic tumbler until I found the right combination of animal hatred and mercenary greed.
I talked about how sort of tertiary, non-game applications of virtual reality felt very futuristic to me, more futuristic than the sense of being embodied in a multi-sensory electronic hallucination, because they’re functions ported from reality. I forgot it, but there was a non-VR thing that had occurred in the car on the way in that morning which I forgot to mention, but I thought you would find it interesting anyway. These thoughts will fill the wasted hours before the release of Overwatch.
A couple years ago, there were a series of telemarketing calls that made the media rounds. There must be some kind of sticky resin on an idea for it to travel these channels, and in this case it was because the Telemarketer was automated, but refused to admit that it was automated. It had a number of excuses for why you were wrong about it being automated, which it would deploy in a sequence. I love these things; I am always messing with them.
I received one about the Marriot or some shit, they wanted me to roll through or whatever and activate social media, but I replied instead, “Are you a Robot?” because I’d heard this intro before and liked the responses.
Except it said “Yes.” And my forehead began to perspire a little, because I don’t know that I’d ever heard a robot say this. I understand that it’s just a recording, don’t get me wrong. I know it’s not the fucking WOPR. It’s about how it feels, which presages a reality where such things coalesce.
I said, “Wait. You’re a cyborg?”
“Yes,” it said. So far, so good. Then, it said:
“Is that okay?”
I think we’re at the end of Doom now; or, if there is something worse than the thing we’re fighting now, I don’t know how much I want to see it. Jesus Christ, people. If we can pulp this Hell Person, I’m of a mind to head straight back to the main menu and jump into a new campaign. Gabriel has suggested he does not do this; I don’t do it either.
The story is so gloriously dumb. Good God. They know it, too. There is a voice on the intercom that sometimes tells you there’s too many demons. It’s not clear what a good number would be. Somebody at this Mars company had to record that line - that’s how likely they thought it would be that there would be too many demons at some point. Also, Hell Energy. That’s how you know they’re not trying to be clever, and failing, which is what usually happens. It’s Hell by way of Andrew W. K., and I can’t wait to go back.
Hey! So, Gabe is working on his coloring book, but I’m working on a book also, with Gabe. I think I’m about halfway done with it, maybe? I don’t know, I’ve never done anything like it before. I really had a good time reciting poems at the last Acquisitions Incorporated game - you can watch the whole thing, or skip to 2:39.20 to see what I’m talking about. Maybe listen to it in your headphones. I don’t know how it works where you… like, work.
I didn’t really expect to do whatever I’m doing now. It was my intention to write poems, occasionally sing those poems, and then die early. It didn’t work out like that. I need to fill this interminable twilight somehow, and this is one of the ways I’m going to do it:
I’ll “bind” these up somehow and get them on a digital bookstore in an electronic slab, I’ve got tons of them. Essentially I want to be Shel Silverstein, if Shel Silverstein needed his best friend to draw all of it, and if he really liked Dungeons and Dragons. Shel Silverstein, Mark Twain, and Neal Stephenson, all at once, in the same person, but with the regular number of limbs. I feel like it’s weird otherwise.
Coloring books are a big deal at my house. My wife likes to chill out and color in her Frozen coloring book at night while we watch TV. Obviously my little one likes them too but the reality is that all sorts of people want to color these days. So I thought it might be fun to make a Penny Arcade coloring book and I wanted to see what you all thought of the idea since you would be the ones doing the coloring.
I pulled the line art out of some recent comics and Kiko formatted them for optimal coloring. You can download three pages right here, print them out and get your coloring on today!
I’d actually love to see the results too. Send me pics of your coloring pages and I’ll post my favorites here on the site. I’ll even send out some PA gift cards to my favorites! Basically though I just want to know if this is something you guys would like us to make for real. I’m imagining a big old coloring book full of line art from PA strips. Maybe we could do an Eyrewood section, and some word puzzles? I think it would be really fun but is that something you guys want? Let me know.