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Tycho / on Wed, Apr 9 2008 at 12:00 am

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The Obliterator

As a young man running games of TMNT after school, I wanted (desperately, like most young men) to be liked.  This meant that every day was Christmas for the brutal emus, toads, and mutated serpents in my charge.  I would spend my lunches in the library hatching well-appointed, poorly defended laboratories for my parties to scour and claim as their own.  Like the earthly avatar of benevolence, I dispensed hovercrafts.  I dispensed HE Washing Machines for efficient cleaning after daring operations.  These first two were jokes, but I did in actual fact give them a dirigible at one point, with an armored balloon, mechanics shop, comfortable berths, clone vats, and over forty-five distinct hardpoints.  It could also, um…  travel through time.  Time travel wasn’t even its most noteworthy feature.

I could go on.

Those days are gone, the wick burned down to the plate - now, the player is my enemy.  When I reach for my dice, I want a wave of nausea to crash over them.  When I fix the skull clasp of my midnight cloak, I want to see quaking, rodent fear.  And when my blade descends, the table falls in twain.

I’m currently up in the frozen north, writing the second episode of Precipice whenever I am not eating mice or vindicating wolves.  I was able to get through the border without being molested by one of their bear-women this time, which I’m calling a plus.  They had me stew in their purgatory for as long as they possibly could last time, their haunted no-place situated outside any civilized nation, refusing me access to the bathroom so I wouldn’t shit out all of my heroin.

So much of the confusion stemmed from what I do for work.  She couldn’t believe anyone would actually pay me for this, which is understandable.  I sometimes have a hard time believing it myself.

(CW)TB out.

of the sadness, of the woe


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