Dear hilariously defensive forum members of other websites,
I just wanted you to know that I’m feeling left out so you should know that I don’t like whatever site it is that you are fiercely loyal too. It sucks, and the main person/people behind it sucks for making it so sucky. I think everything about it sucks, and you suck for liking it/him/her/them.
PS Please email me the links to the forums threads where you will be “fixing my little red wagon” for the next two days. THANKS!
PPS Oh, and just to make it easier for the personal jabs you should be making against me you can use the fact that I live in Canada, regularly take webcam pictures of myself holding various items with homo-erotic names near my face, and do this really stupid thing where I type in ALL CAPS and obviously think I’m HILARIOUS while I’m doing it. Have fun and DO ME PROUD!