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Gabe / on Mon, Jan 22 2007 at 10:00 am


Well I’m back from Hawaii and feeling pretty damn good. Kara and I realized a few months ago that we’d never really taken a proper vacation. We go down to the Oregon coast every summer but that’s just a few hours away and even in the summer the beach there can be pretty cold. Other than that the only time we travel anyplace is for a convention and those can hardly be considered vacations. So we decided it was time to go someplace warm and relaxing for a change and so we spent five days on Maui.

I won’t bore you with the details but I will relate two stories about our trip. First let’s talk about snorkeling. Everyone who comes back from Hawaii will tell you that snorkeling is some kind of spiritual experience. They are liars. Maybe it was just my constant anxiety or my crippling fear of anything new or a combination of the two, but I found snorkeling to be terrifying. I had rented a boogie board since I’m not a very good swimmer. I figured I could float out around this reef and take in the sights. Kara was waiting for me back on the shore and I waved to her as I paddled out. It was only a few feet deep here and looking down I could see some tiny fish swimming around the rocks. “ey!” I said back to her. The words muffled and distorted by my snorkel. Ere’s ish own ere!” I paddled a bit further and the ground slipped away beneath me. It was much deeper here and where there had been maybe two or three fish below me now there seemed to be hundreds. I started to feel a little uncomfortable. Like I had stumbled into a party I was not invited to.

You really have no peripheral vision when wearing the snorkel mask so when a huge fish appeared right next to my face I was surprised to say the least. I screamed through my snorkel “Oh It! Et uh uck away um ee ish!” I could not stand up out here over the reef and so I began thrashing around in the water while I yelled at the fish. “Uck you ish!” I managed to turn myself around and I paddled as hard as I could back to shore. As soon as I could I stood up and ran out of the water towards my wife. I tore off the snorkel gear and collapsed on the sand. “Did you see that fish?” I said to Kara? It was then that I realized she was laughing. Not just her but also the two old women next to her. “You all could hear me back here?” I asked. She said I screamed so loud that she figured the entire beach heard me. As I looked down the shore I saw plenty of grinning faces. Apparently she was correct. “It came right at me!” I said to the beach. “It was huge! Like…like as big as my fist!”

The next story I want to tell you happened while I was playing golf. I was placed in a group with two old men. Imagine men so old they are nearly dead. Around the fourth or fifth hole these guys realized they had both been accountants before they had retired. They stood at the tee box on the fifth hole and smoked cigars while they talked about the good old days of accounting. The one old man, David turned to the other at one point during their conversation and said “You know what the problem with accounting these days is?” Jerry, the other man puffed on his cigar. “The problem is robots.” David continued. Jerry turned to him and agreed “They let robots do everything these days.” He went on “People think robots never make mistakes but I tell you what, they are in for a big surprise.” He gestured with his cigar as he foretold the coming robot apocalypse. “Yes sir, a big surprise.”

Anyway the trip was incredible and we’re already talking about going back next year. It’s not like my job is super stressful or anything but it’s nice to get away once in a while. I really feel like I got my batteries recharged.

Oh and it’s true I picked up the Burning Crusade expansion. I’m back on Dark Iron after being gone for six or seven months and it feels pretty good. If you also grabbed the expansion be sure and pick up the new strategy guide. We did a bunch of exclusive Burning Crusade comics for it.

-Gabe out

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