Okay let’s talk about what happened yesterday.
I woke up yesterday to some angry emails and tweets about a panel at PAX Aus. The panel is going to be a discussion about all the social justice stuff happening in the games industry and if it is making for better games. It’s important to know that all panels are submitted by the community and we try and give anyone who wants a place to speak the space to do it. I responded that you don’t have to go to any panels you don’t like or alternatively you could go and tell them what you think.
I was called a bigot and told that I was giving a stage to bigots. I had not even had breakfast yet. I said again that if they have a different opinion they are welcome to submit their own panel. I was then called “cis male garbage”. Someone then tweeted at me that I should die.
I should have walked away from my computer at this point and played with my dog but instead I put on my asshole hat and went to work. I said if you use the word “cis” don’t bother tweeting me. This brought back another twitter argument from a week or so ago in which I defended a game about female masturbation. This game only included vaginas which I thought was reasonable given the point of the game was to teach women how to masturbate. It was pointed out to me that not all women have vaginas and I will admit right here in front of everyone that this came as a big shock to me. Some people called the game exclusionary because it did not take into account the existence of transexuals. I said I think a game about female masturbation that only has vaginas made sense because women have vaginas and men have a penis. This was not meant to invalidate the trans community but I was told it did. I apologized but I was labeled “transphobic” and so when all this stuff came up yesterday I think it was just more fuel to the fire. I was super pissed yesterday. I was called a bigot and I think if I wasn’t pissed that would probably be bad. The thing is I wasn’t mad at trans people or gay people or whatever. I’m not going to go into the intricacies of my family here on twitter but being called a bigot really bothers me. I was mad at the assholes who have no fucking idea who I am but when you go hard on twitter plenty of innocent people get caught in the crossfire. I’m very good at being a jerk. It’s sort if my superpower. When it comes to Penny Arcade it has served me well but it’s not okay when I make a bunch of people who are already marginalized feel like shit.
I hate lots of people it’s true. But I’ve never hated anyone for their sexual orientation or their gender situation. I don’t hate people for superficial shit like that. I hate people for the way they act and I intend to keep doing that. It’s a very strange position to be in. This massive organization has built up around my friend Jerry and I. I know personally I’m an incredibly damaged individual. I’m not really sure I’m the best foundation for all this other stuff. I don’t want to be the reason people don’t go to PAX or don’t support Child’s Play or don’t watch the shows on PATV. I hate the idea that because I can’t stop being an asshole I hurt all these other amazing things.
I’m very sorry about yesterday. There are very few things that someone can say to me that will actually make me lose my temper. All my buttons got pushed yesterday though and I snapped. I doubt that will change anyone’s opinion but there you go. I’m not qualified to talk about the ambiguity of sexuality and frankly I don’t give a shit about it. I like drawing comics and playing video games. I’ll keep my mouth shut when it comes to all the other stuff.