As Was Foretold
Kotaku is, like any other coherent entity, an ingot of unforgivable sin anodized with a millimeter of virtue. Look, I don’t know what I tell you: I grew up in Church. I’m saying nothing about Kotaku that I wouldn’t say about myself. I go to Kotaku like a hundred times a day. I’ve described on many occasions how their job is not actually possible and I have tremendous sympathy for what is required of them - to be both universal and incisive in their every word and deed - in an endless, recursive, public hellscape of Sisyphus two-point-oh.
If Amy Hennig leaves Naughty Dog, please tell me. That’s a huge deal. If Amy Hennig goes over to EA to work on some Star Wars shit, that’s super important to me yes thank you and I want to know. But there’s Inside Baseball, and then there’s whatever Kotaku was doing telling me about some kind of management thing, which is like two page, centerfold style shots of a single organelle within the cell of an organism hunted to extinction in the 1800s.
I have no idea what the fuck I’m supposed to do with this information.
I did a search trying to find the article, and it looks like tons of people got this press release and then sighed over their keyboards for a few minutes. Quite a few of these articles seem to have wriggled free of a decomposing whale carcass; watch them twist on the wet sand. If what you have written about a press release is not longer than the press release, take your hands off the keys and push your chair a couple feet away from your desk. Call your mom. Spend a few moments thinking about The Earth. Run a quick calculation regarding the time you have left, and how you want to spend it.