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Tycho / on Fri, May 3 2002 at 6:55 am

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Resident Evil, Addendum

We’ve got a new strip up.  We do that sort of thing.

We played Resident Evil for the second evening in a row, and I truly envy a person going through this for the first time.  Yeah, it has the same old shitty RE controls, without the superior mobility afforded by the series’ third installment, Nemesis.  It’s still a triumph.  Back in the day, Evil Dead tackled video backgrounds, which were really intriguing in parts but served as a backdrop to a criminally shitty game.  The Fear Effects did video too, but they weren’t going for anything approaching something that would be mistaken for imagery that was close to other graphics which were situated anywhere near others that looked in any way realistic.  By contrast, we’ll look at a given scene in Resident Evil and have no idea how it was constructed.  When was the last time that happened?  Is that video down there?  We don’t know.  I’m fain to mention specific “holy shit” instances, because there’s still a chance you broke your leg or something and couldn’t go get it.  Well, you need to.  The parts you remember will directly stimulate your nostalgia cortex, while the new stuff and the new look will fuck your brain right out of your head.  Seriously.  You’re going to be, like, “Where’s my Goddamn brain, oh right, RE fucked it out.” 

In short, the new RE is satisfying beyond the realms of satiation. 

I was hoping to do a Spider-Man comic for Friday, trying to get in on this Spidey Fridey thing r. stevens had going on, but it just didn’t happen.  We may pop on later with unsolicited opinions on the film, I know I will at least, and you will be made to endure them.  Even Brenna wants to go, which is virtually unprecedented.   

Sometimes when we have something really intrusting on tap, E3 let’s say, I grapple with whether or not I should actually say anything.  It’s just propriety that makes me feel this way, and obviously I say it anyhow, but it is a concept I refer to internally as The Turkey Principle (T2P).  Like so:

“On the 21st of May, tender birds not unlike the one you see on the left will be placed before my ready knife and fork.  You, yourself, could not possibly access a feast approaching this threshhold of succulence.  This cunning fowl, fed a strict diet and conforming to the most rigorous metrics of quality, will yield to my dark appetites like a Flavor Harem, performing a sensual dance before I consume it with the precision of a controlled burn.”

I don’t want to be the guy who discusses his inaccessible turkey at length.  At the same time, a light description of it (think “Harlequin Romance,” soft porn) might be better than nothing, so here goes.  For some reason unbeknownst to us, Amazon - yes, the book Amazon - has asked us to interview humans from the Star Wars Galaxies team.  We won’t be allowing Batjew into this, because any questions Batjew might ask would focus on a) Juice, or b) the exact time and location of the next Pizza Party.  Anyhow, I’ll toss up a thread on the phorum closer to the event, and we’ll snare a few good q’s out of that.  Next item:  as has become a tradition, we’ll be seeing Neverwinter Nights again this year, but it’s far enough along now that I doubt we’ll be able to take advantage of their northern bounty ever again.  This year’s display apparently revolves around actually playing it for an hour or so, which leads me to believe that we’ll have some extremely solid information for you.  The third thing we have set up, just did this one actually, is to see an overview of the Xbox online service, Xbox Live.  Two years ago, Square’s presentation for their “PlayOnline” service really shook me up.  It pointed toward an elegant, global network with the assurance that we were almost there - and now that it’s almost here, what I know already makes me think that Xbox Live is underpinned by a more holistic strategy. In any event, we’ll know very soon.   

I want to pick up Morrowind, as my simian associate has, but I think everybody likes to read a review, even of a game they know they’re going to buy.  My only concern is that I won’t be seeing the whole game without at least a Geforce 3, as some of the things I’ve seen in shots look to be generated with.  I just haven’t felt the need to buy one, yet.  “Curse you, progress” I suppose, but I can hardly ever find a time where three hundred dollars doesn’t leave a gaping wound in my finances.

Karen wanted me to let you know that the latest installment of Love & Hate is available.  She probably didn’t want me to let you know that she behaves like a Wet Cat in it, but it’s really to late to do anything about that.

(CW)TB out.

like chicken cordon bleu

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