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Gabe / on Fri, Oct 26 2012 at 10:34 am

Harry Potter and the Forbidden journey

When we arrived at Harry Potter world for the first time our little group made a beeline for Hogwarts in an effort to be the first on the Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey ride. I was pulled along with them even though I don’t actually go on many rides. Erika shouted at us not to stop as we ran past Ollivander’s wand shop. None of us had ever been before and so we were all floored by Hogwarts. The line for the ride winds through the castle but it’s so cool that there is a separate line for people who just want to see the castle but not go on the ride. This is what I should have done.

We passed multiple signs all warning about motion sickness and people with heart conditions. I expressed my concern to the group but was assured that if I could do Star Tours I could handle this ride. It’s true that I can do Star Tours but I would say that it is on the ragged edge of my ability. If it wasn’t Star Wars there is no way I would subject myself to it. Let me tell you right now that Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey isn’t a goddamned thing like Star Tours. Star Tours might as well be one of those rocking cars you put a quarter in at the grocery store compared to Harry Potter. Within the first 5 seconds of Harry Potter I knew I was in trouble.

Right off the bat you are suspended in front of a massive screen that makes you feel like you are hurtling over Hogwarts on a broomstick. I felt sick immediately. I closed my eyes hoping that if I wasn’t watching the screen I could limit the motion sickness. I started taking deep breaths and tried to focus on keeping my breakfast south of my esophagus. As the chair I was in rocked and spun I began to realize I was fighting a losing battle. At one point I was blasted by an incredible heat and smelled sulfur. This did not help matters. The girls on either side of me screamed and I was later told that it was a dragon. Awesome.

As vomiting turned from a possibility into certainty I started trying to focus on how best to throw up. I didn’t want to end the ride covered in my own puke so projecting out and away from myself was important. Perhaps I could time my hurling to coincide with one of the sporadic forward tilts of the ride? That seemed unlikely. I began working through a second scenario where I simple blew chunks all over myself. Obviously my clothes would be ruined but was that such a bad thing? Perhaps I could simply replace them with a Ravenclaw uniform purchased from the Harry Potter gift shop. Getting rid of these Muggle clothes and slipping into an unplanned cosplay might even be fun!

As I cemented the last of my post spew plans I heard Harry potter himself thank me for my help. The ride was over! I mentally congratulated my body on keeping its shit together just as the ride gave one final rock. That’s when it happened. I brought my hands up in time to catch the first wave as I rushed out the exit looking for a bathroom. The closest one was all the way back in Hogsmeade. This seemed like negligence bordering on criminal to me as I continued to wretch into my hands. I stumbled into the bathroom where my Fruit Loops made their own forbidden journey. Some part of my brain noticed that Moaning Myrtle was laughing at me and I appreciated the attention to detail.

I spent the next few hours sitting in the Three Broomsticks nursing a delicious pear cider. I watched everyone’s bags as the rest of my crew made trips back to Hogwarts and the other roller coasters around the park. If not for the crippling nausea I have to admit that’s exactly how I would have prefered to spend my time in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Eventually my stomach settled down and I graduated from cider to Butterbeer. It was just as good as I had hoped.

-Gabe out

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