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Tycho / on Wed, May 22 2013 at 12:01 am

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With Gabriel’s adoption of the Surface Pro (and thus, a gaming capable PC) as a lifestyle totem, we have penetrated so far into weirdo territory that I will hear beepboops of unknown provenance over there and wonder where they’re from.  We played Sanctum back in “the day,” liked it, and then interred it for some reason I don’t entirely recall.  I knew the sequel was coming out, and I was gonna say we should play it, but he beat me to it.  Get your head around that shit.

We haven’t been able to play it for the last couple days because of the Child’s Play Invitational and the Xbox Thing, but man oh man.  I like Tower Defense games that are also Action Games, of which I find Orcs Must Die 2 to manifest the gold standard.  We’ll see where this goes, though: Sanctum 2 offers up to four players and an interesting progression mechanic, so I think there’s a lot left here for us to find.

As regards the Xbox Unveilination, Gabriel has described it as “a massive fuckup.”  He did that just now, a few seconds ago, and I was surprised to learn upon leaving the event yesterday that most people appear to agree.

I expected to languish there during an extended treatise on how mothafuckas are gonna be watching teevee in the future, when the TV stuff was more interesting than almost anything else.  It’s the kind of daily use technology that isn’t sexy to most people.  It’s why I’ll sift a hundred shots until I find the one with a clear picture of the current UI.  I am a fetishist; I’m into kinky shit like “prices” and what I perceive to be “live game footage” and “implementation.”  I strongly suspect that Galabriel is allergic to the Kinect, you can’t make him use it.  But they want to.  So, there’s that.

There were simply…  holes, in the presentation, holes I had an expectation would be filled, and they were not.  The timing is complex; we’ve essentially been served hors d’oeuvres, and dinner isn’t for another three weeks.  And, as the day progressed, we were treated to speculation followed by loose message discipline followed by updates to stories followed by alterations to the narrative, etc.  This phase, not the presentation, was the rocket falling through the atmosphere.  It was grotesque and folded in on itself; it was an orgy of insensate, albino serpents.

I don’t understand how even a catastrophic presentation here is necessarily a boon for the Playstation; neither machine is available, and won’t be for months.  When I go home, I’m not playing any console: I’m playing games on Steam, the service which clearly acts as the template for the Xbox One.  Sony is much, much better at this part of the metagame, absolutely.  In the same way that I reserve judgment on Microsoft’s hardware, I reserve judgment on Sony’s service aspirations.  You sort of need to ask yourself what we actually know.

If you want to marinate in caustic fluids, fear not: Ben was there also, and it worked him into a froth.

(CW)TB out.

(mostly instrumental)

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