I didn’t chime in last week with all the talk about whining gamers because those other two long-winded goats managed to make this page a mile long every day and I didn’t want to look like some “metoo!” at the end of the rainbow. But, with Tycho “dealt” with and Gabe preoccupied with brownies and milk I figure now’s as good a time as any.
I’ve noticed a growing trend this past year. Bitching and moaning in multiplayer games has become so bad, it seems you can’t join any server with people on it without having to listen to [ClanIdiot]MastA_KiLLA_Y0_Pr0per and his “peeps” go on and on about how much everything sucks in whatever game it is you’re playing, how whatever weapon you’re using is cheap or your using it means you’re impotent. There was talk of making mods replacing weapons with hugs, puppies and kittens, but I think I have a better idea. How about a mod that just disables the chat functions? I present to you: THE SHUT UP MOD!!!
Lucasarts’ recent announcement of a long awaited follow-up to their classic WW2 flight sims is the kind of music that soothes the soul, makes me reminisce about the days of ol’, etc. If you’re going to be digging around in the attic, Lucasarts, why don’t you make a new Full Throttle ame while you’re up there?
Totally Games is at the helm again - great news. But if there’s a God in heaven, they’ll be making a modern XvT next with the proven technology. The original Xwing Vs. Tie Fighter was ahead of the technology curve on fully two axes - one, it employed these new-fangled 3d accelerators. Two, it was a game that would have benefitted from wider access to broadband services. With our modern technology, I believe this is possible, desireable, and potentially very lucrative. Now do it.
I don’t really have much to say today. I do want to drop some Penny Arcade updates on you though.
We are in the process of re-stocking two of our T-shirt designs. If you have been waiting to get your hands on Wang-Fu, or Shut Your Pie Hole you shouldn’t have to wait much longer.
Members of Club Penny Arcade should get part three of our behind the scenes look at PA in their mail very soon. If you haven’t already signed up for this month it’s not too late. Become a member today and get access to parts two and three.
I’ve had a few people ask about the mysterious Land of the Rising Fun logo in the features section. I’m not sure I’m ready to tell you what that’s going to be just yet. I will say Tycho and I are very excited about it though. As my hero Mr. Wonka said “The suspense is terrible…I hope it’ll last.”
Thanks to everyone who wrote in about my age rant on Monday. I must have hit a nerve or something because I have never gotten that much mail before in the almost four years I have been doing PA.
Many of you have written in with questions on a variety of subjects.
I Want To Be a Ninja, But All I Have Is a Black Shirt: Well, that’s all you really need, as it turns out. The original link for the image is right here, but it was kind of slowing down when I tried to go there. I made a local copy.
Is There Some Way to Try Out The Warhammer 40k CCG without Buying a Deck?: Oh yes! You might also find this rulebook useful. True Warhammer enthusiasts have sent fearful letters my way, curious as to whether or not this game is an acceptable use of the franchise. Well, I’ll be finding out this weekend, when the Master of the Ravenwing runs me through it. You may be assured that I will tell all.
Who Would Claim Victory In a No-Holds-Barred Monkey Fight, Quincy Or Columbo?: Only you can find that out.
I Heard The Portable Monopoly Guy Went Out Of Business!: Nothing could be further from the truth. I’ve talked to him recently, and it sounds like things are actually going quite well. There was a problem with his use of the word “Monopoly,” because I guess companies own our language now or something, but that’s a separate issue. He just changed his url.
That should about do it.
Here’s today’s comic.
Please, feel free to examine the two new shots available at Gamespot, although your guess is as good as mine as to what these shots actually depict. We do offer helpful suggestions for one of them in our strip today, but theses images are so pregnant with meaning - I mean, ambiguity - that it is utterly mystifying why they were made available. Well, maybe not all that mystifying - I mean, everybody went and looked at it, so, you know, mission accomplished I guess.
Where I used to suckle for a few minutes at least on a screenshot archive, I now find myself uninterested (for the most part) in that form of promotion. You’ve got shots like this RE stuff, which are (quite possibly) just camstills taken in their office with the lights off and Bob-san dressed as a zombie. You’ve got miserable shit, like the stuff they put out for Kabuki Warriors or Bruce Lee - I’m not exactly Mr. PR or anything, but what the fuck is wrong with you people? What makes you show your ass like that? If it comes down to showing nothing, or shoving your dick in my eye, I shouldn’t have to properly deliniate your course of action. Then, you’ve got the excellent shots which (in the volume they are released, these days) invariably detract from the final experience. I try to maintain some vestige of surprise anymore.
By the way, that same screenshot archive goes back to RE Zero’s N64 roots, please don’t think it’s the Cube responsible for those Dinty Moore, man-sized pixels. It be like Diesel Sweeties or some shit.
I have a compression fetish, which I’m essentially “out” about. Mostly rehabilitated, I can now fight the urge to squish things - but it is this fetish that caused me to post a link to Ogg Vorbis, a free, open audio standard. It warmed my heart to hear that Unreal Tournament 2003 would be using Ogg Vorbis as its default music format, and it’s easy to see how a developer (specifically, a developer’s bottom line) could benefit from compact, quality audio without licensing the now ubiquitous MP3. I just thought this was a pleasant bit of dork news, and I hadn’t seen it emphasized anywhere. Thanks to Unreality for the great article.
I don’t know if Gabe will be more chipper, the odds are leaning towards no, but I think I’m gonna wrap up the post here. I’ve recently acquired some exciting new illness - I’m sorry I didn’t issue a proper press release, but it hurts to even think right now. In fact, the only thoughts I can coax out of my mind involve me crawling from the computer chair to the bedroom. I was supposed to go over to Gabe’s yesterday to play Soccer Slam (which I crave chiefly of all the Earth’s delights) and had to turn it down. Yes, it’s that serious.
too bad you couldn’t do good at marriage